KagsChann's Commentary on My Immortal
by kagschannold
Summary: are you a goffik, or a prep? find out in Tara Gillespie's My Immortal, where i take and commentary on each and ever ridiculous thing she wrote way back when.
1. Chapter 1

_For those of you that have either came across this story before it was deleted, or have read the other commentaries on this story, you might know what is about to happen._

_For the souls that have never read this story before and have stumbled across my commentary, sit down, get some popcorn, and prepare yourselves._

_I have read other commentaries, and I ultimately decided… why not write one of my own?_

_DISCLAIMER: I do not, under any circumstances, own this poor excuse for a Harry Potter fan fiction. That honour goes to Tara Gillespie. Or however the hell she spells it. I own the commentary, though. _

_I solemnly swear that I am up to no good. (I have full right to be as much of a bitch as possible. :D so, enjoy. I'll rate this M, just because. Hopefully my Commentary doesn't get taken down D:)_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik) 2 my gf (ew not in that way) raven, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok!. Justin ur da luv of my deprzzing life . u rok 2! . MCR ROX! <strong>

**Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way **_You poor thing._** and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) . with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears **_so… you're telling us you have CLEAR blue eyes? Clear blue, people._** and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee **_I'm sure Amy Lee is happy she has such a… flattering doppleganger_** (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!). I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. **_That, deary, would be considered incest, and your Gerard Way obsession is completely unnecessary._** I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. **_Opposed to?_** I have pale white skin. **_White is as pale as it gets. There is nothing paler. Stick with either or._** I'm also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England **_You git, Hogwarts is in Scotland._** where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) **_Noooo. I would have NEVER guessed. I thought you were a cheerleader._** and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. ****For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. **_Black, black, black… pink. Fishnet at that. I used to like fishnet, but then I grew up._** I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. **_Wait a minute. You're white… and you wear- bloody hell._** I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun **_that's usually the case_**, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. **_Probably wondering where your UNIFORM was._** I put up my middle finger at them. **

**"Hey Ebony!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Draco Malfoy! **_Draco Malfoy is known for approaching girls that look like total sluts. That's an easy lay, so… why not? _

**"What's up Draco?" I asked. **

**"Nothing." he said shyly.**_ You've done something to him. Draco is anything BUT shy, and if he was, then someone put a charm on him. _

**But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away. **_If I had to choose between talking to my friends or talking to Draco, I would most likely choose him. But, then again, the Draco YOU are talking about is not the same person._

**AN: IS it good? PLZ tell me fangz! **_It's terrible. You're welcome. _


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Fangz 2 bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da chapta! BTW preps stop flaming ma story ok! **_They flame because they care. Wait… NO THEY DON'T._

**The next day I woke up in my bedroom. . **_So nothing else happened after you ran off with your GOFFICK friends?_** It was snowing and raining again. **_Fucked up weather._** I opened the door of my coffin and drank some blood from a bottle I had. **_Okay. Let's break this down a bit: you… woke up in your bed, saw that it was raining… AND snowing, and then you tell me you came out of your coffin? Hogwarts has coffins now? Don't even get me started on how you could tell it was raining and snowing when you were enclosed in…a coffin. _**My coffin was black ebony and inside it was hot pink velvet with black lace on the ends. I got out of my coffin and took of my giant MCR t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a black leather dress, a pentagram necklace, combat boots and black fishnets on. **_asdfghjkl; she needs a rulebook stat._** I put on four pairs of earrings in my pierced ears, . and put my hair in a kind of messy bun. .**

**My friend, Willow (AN: Raven dis is u!) woke up then and grinned at me. She flipped her long waist-length raven black hair with pink streaks and opened her forest-green eyes. She put on her Marilyn Manson t-shirt with a black mini, fishnets and pointy high-heeled boots. **_Apparently NO ONE goes by the dress-code anymore. Albus Dumbledore, you need your glasses changed if you can't see these sluts prancing around your hallways._** We put on our makeup (black lipstick white foundation and black eyeliner.) **

**"OMFG, I saw you talking to Draco Malfoy yesterday!" she said excitedly.**

**"Yeah? So?" I said, blushing. **

**"Do you like Draco?" she asked as we went out of the Slytherin common room and into the Great Hall. "No I so fucking don't!" I shouted.. **_But, you really do._

**"Yeah right!" she exclaimed. **

**Just then, Draco walked up to me. **_Turn the other way. Or better yet, get a bucket of red paint and dump it over her little vampire head._

**"Hi." he said.**

**"Hi." I replied flirtily. **_I say things flirtily all the time. _

**"Guess what." he said.**

**"What?" I asked.**

**"Well, Good Charlotte are having a concert in Hogsmeade." he told me. **_Muggles in Hogsmeade. Isn't that… you know… Well, I guess she wouldn't know, would she?_

**"Oh. My. Fucking. God!" I screamed. I love GC. They are my favorite band, besides MCR. **

**"Well…. do you want to go with me?" he asked. I gasped. **_Unless you are planning to humiliate her in front of thousands of other muggles, then don't take her. _


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: STOP FLAMMING DA STORY PREPZ OK! odderwize fangs 2 da goffik ppl 4 da good reveiws! FANGS AGEN RAVEN! oh yeah, BTW I don't own dis or da lyrics 4 Good Chralotte. **_You put in lyrics to a Good Charlotte Song in an already horrible story?_

**On the night of the concert I put on my black lace-up boots with high heels. Underneath them were ripped red fishnets. Then I put on a black leather minidress with all this corset stuff **_I'm sure you look like a hooker. All Purdy and shit._** on the back and front. I put on matching fishnet on my arms. I straightened my hair and made it look all spiky. . **_Great Scott! A new hairstyle! Straight spiky hair!_** I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wristsI **_Getting ready for a concert makes you… want to cut yourself? _**I read a depressing book while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some GC. I painted my nails black and put on TONS of black eyeliner. **_Because you totally needed that._** Then I put on some black lipstick. I didn't put on foundation because I was pale anyway. **_That didn't really stop you before._** I drank some human blood so I was ready to go to the concert. I went outside. **

**Draco was waiting there in front of his flying car. **_Draco Malfoy with a flying car. _** He was wearing a Simple Plan t-shirt (they would play at the show too), baggy black skater pants, black nail polish and a little eyeliner (AN: A lot fo kewl boiz wer it ok!). **_Lucius, Narcissa, aren't you proud of your little baby boy?_

**"Hi Draco!" I said in a depressed voice. **_Depressed with an exclamation point._

**"Hi Ebony." he said back. **

**We walked into his flying black Mercedes-Benz (the license plate said 666) . and flew to the place with the concert. On the way we listened excitedly to Good Charlotte and Marilyn Manson. We both smoked cigarettes and drugs. **_Your parents will hear about this. I would rather you stick with the Dark Mark._

**When we got there, we both hopped out of the car. We went to the mosh pit wattes at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Good Charlotte.**

**"You come in cold, you're covered in blood .They're all so happy you've arrived .The doctor cuts your cord, hands you to your mom She sets you free into this life." sang Joel (I don't own da lyrics 2 dat song). **_Clearly. _

**"Joel is so fucking hot." I said to Draco, pointing to him as he sung, filling the club with his amazing voice.**

**Suddenly Draco looked sad. **

**"What's wrong?" **_You didn't boost his ego, and made him emo. Bahaha, I made a rhyme guys!_** I asked as we moshed to the music. **

**Then I caught on. "Hey, it's ok I don't like him better than YOU!" I said. **

**"Really?" asked Draco sensitively. **_Draco… I like it when you're a bad boy. Being sensitive makes you such a pussy._** and he put his arm around me all protective. **_You now have an STD. _

**"Really." I said. "Besides I don't even know Joel and he's going out with Hilary fucking Duff. I fucking hate that little bitch. " I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly blonde face. **_Blonde faces. _

**The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Draco. After the concert, we drank some beer and asked Benji and Joel for their autographs and photos with them. We got GC concert tees. Draco and I crawled back into the Mercedes-Benz, **_Has anyone seen a Mercedes Benz in Harry Potter? No. I know I haven't._** but Draco didn't go back into Hogwarts, instead he drove the car into… the Forbidden Forest! **_Like… ohmigawd girlfriend, no way!_


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: I sed stup flaming ok ebony's name is ENOBY **_Ebony… Enoby. I don't really think they care._** nut mary su OK! DRACO IS SOO IN LUV wif her dat he is acting deferent **_Draco is definitely on some sort of demented Love Potion. Where are Fred and George. Did you sell that potion to Ebony and let her poison Draco? Professor Slughorn is behind this…_** dey nu eechodder b4 ok! **_You could have mentioned that, but I'm sure you would have found a way to destroy their meeting too._

**"DRACO!" I shouted. "What the fuck do you think you are doing?" Draco didn't answer but he stopped the flying car and he walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously. . **_I walk out of flying cars all the time. _

**"What the fucking hell?" I asked angrily. **

**"Ebony?" he asked.**

**"What?" I snapped.**

**Draco leaned in extra-close and I looked into his gothic red eyes (he was wearing color contacts) which revealed so much depressing sorrow and evilness and then suddenly I didn't feel mad anymore. And then… suddenly just as I Draco kissed me passionately. **_When I think of kissing Draco Malfoy passionately, I think of him cornering me in the shadows, pushing me hard against the stone wall, and snogging me much against my will. Possibly ending up with some sort of bruising that I would later tell my friends happened when I fell down the stairs… on my face… Because Draco told me to. (Oh dear god, she is rubbing off on me… kill me now. AVADA KEDAVRA!)_** Draco climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. He took of my top . and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie **_Penis, Cock, Schlong. Just say it._** into my you-know-what **_No, I don't know. What?_** and we did it for the first time. "Oh! Oh! Oh! " I screamed. **_Oh, God, Draco… Oh god yes. XD_** I was beginning to get an orgasm. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. **_One lovely second of sex, and she climaxed. _**And then…. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!" It was….Dumbledore! **_Dumbledore now says Mother fuckers. He also appears out of nowhere in the Forbidden Forest. Like MAGIC -tch tch bong!-_


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: STOP flaming! if u flam it menz ur a prep or a posr! **_Yes. I am a poser because I flame you._** Da only reson Dumbledeor swor is coz he had a hedache ok an on tup of dat he wuz mad at dem 4 having sexx! PS im nut updating umtil I get five good revoiws! **

**Dumbledore made and Draco and I follow him. He kept shouting at us angrily.**

**"You ludacris fools!" he shouted. **

**I started to cry tears of blood down my pallid face. . Draco comforted me. When we went back to the castle Dumbledore took us to Professor Snape and Professor McGonagall who were both looking very angry. **

**"They were having sexual intercourse in the Forbidden Forest!" he yelled in a furious voice.**

**"Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?" asked Professor McGonagall. **_McGonagall calls students dunces, this is great. _

**"How dare you?" demanded Professor Snape. **

**And then Draco shrieked. "BECAUSE I LOVE HER!" **_Because he needed an easy lay, and it only took him a second._

**Everyone was quiet. **

**Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall still looked mad but Professor Snape said. "Fine. Very well. You may go up to your rooms." **_Snape approves of 'sexual intercourse in the Forbidden Forest'. Severus, are you just saying that so you can watch?_

**Draco and I went upstairs while the teachers glared at us. **_They glared as you walked up the stairs._

**"Are you okay, Ebony?" Draco asked me gently. **

**"Yeah I guess." I lied. I went to the girl's dorm and brushed my teeth and my hair and changed into a low-cut black floor-length dress with red lace all around it and black high heels. **_You changed into something like that to go to bed?_

**When I came out…. Draco was standing in front of the bathroom **_But you said you were in the dormitory… how did you get into the bathroom without leaving?_**, and he started to sing 'I just wanna live' by Good Charlotte. **

**I was so flattered, even though he wasn't supposed to be there. We hugged and kissed. After that, we said goodnight and he reluctantly went back into his room. **_I would be happy to be leaving you._


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: shjt up prepz ok! PS I wnot update ubtil u give me goood revows! **_You said that last chapter, and yet… here we are again._

**The next day I woke up in my coffin. I put on a black miniskirt that was all ripped around the end **_Because mini skirts need to also be ripped._** and a matching top with red skulls all over it and high heeled boots that were black. **_Shocking. I thought you were going to tell me you wore nurse shoes._** I put on two pairs of skull earrings, and two crosses in my ears. I spray-painted my hair with purple **_Spray Paint. In your hair. That sounds so healthy. _

**In the Great Hall, I ate some Count Chocula **_Why eat that when they give you better food?_** cereal with blood **_Never eating Count Chocula ever again without that image in my head._** instead of milk, and a glass of red blood. **_Pumpkin juice or butterbear. Please stick to one or the other and stop killing all the Ravenclaws._** . Suddenly someone bumped into me. All the blood spilled over my top. "Bastard!" I shouted angrily.. I regretted saying it when I looked up cause I was looking into the pale white face of a gothic boy with spiky black hair with red streaks in it. . He was wearing so much eyeliner that I was going down his face and he was wearing black lipstick. **_He was wearing so much eyeliner that you were going down on his face?_** . He didn't have glasses anymore **_Oh dear. This can't be…_** and now he was wearing red contact lenses just like Draco's and there was no scar on his forhead anymore **_And yet… It is_**. He had a manly stubble on his chin. He had a sexy English accent **_Already had an accent, thanks for letting us know._**. He looked exactly like Joel Madden **_Joel's doppelganger is almost as worse as you being Amy Lee's!_**. He was so sexy that my body went all hot when I saw him kind of like an erection only I'm a girl so I didn't get one you sicko. **_You can't get hot, you confused the hell out of several people just now, and you're making my brain bleed. Can't you just say "horny" like normal people?_** "I'm so sorry." he said in a shy voice. ... **_With all that black, you wouldn't expect him to tell you something in a SHY voice._

**"That's all right. What's your name?" I questioned. **_Even after you told me the scar was gone, I knew who he was. Why are you asking his name with that decription?_

**"My name's Harry Potter, although most people call me Vampire these days." **_Harry James Potter, your mother and father would like to tell you they're not at all happy with your choices lately._** he grumbled. **

**"Why?" I exclaimed. **_You exclaimed with a question mark. Yes. I do that too. _

**"Because I love the taste of human blood." he giggled. **_Tehee, I love blood and I giggle like a girl. _

**"Well, I am a vampire." I confessed. **

**"Really?" he whimpered. . **_Shyly, giggling, and now… whimpering?_

**"Yeah." I roared.. **_I'm sure you roared it up over there. _

**We sat down to talk for a while. Then Draco came up behind me and told me he had a surprise for me so I went away with him. **_He has an STD and the surprise is a stake to the heart. Please oh please, Draco, kill her. _


	7. Chapter 7

**Bring me 2 life **_Sorry, I don't think anyone is going to do that. _

**AN: wel ok u guyz im only writting dis cuz I got 5 god reviuws. . n BTW I wont rite da nxt chapter til I git TIN god vons! **_Tin good vons. Hm. _**STO FLAMING OR ILL REPORT U! **_We are entitled to an opinion._** Evony **_There is a point in this story where I will write a list of all the different names she gives to people. Starting with Enoby and Evony. _**isn't a Marie Sue ok she isn't perfect SHES A SATANITS! n she has problemz shes depressed 4 godz sake! **_a Satanist saying "for god's sake", would that qualify as an oxymoron? _

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX **

**Draco and I held our pale white hands with black nail polish as we went upstairs. I was wearing red Satanist sings on my nails in red nail polish **_No, that sounds like a very bad problem for one's sinuses… and not to mention the dryer._** (AN: c doez dat sound lik a Maru Sue 2 u?). **

**I waved to Vampire. Dark misery was in his depressed eyes **_Imagine that._**. I guess he was jealous of me that I was going out with Draco. Anyway, I went upstairs excitedly with Draco. We went into his room and locked the door. Then… **

**We started frenching passively **_Passively snogging Draco. Yeah. I want to snog him good and make sure he takes part in it. Passively just won't do._**. and we took off each others clothes enthusiastically. He felt me up before I took of my top. **_Your clothes are already off, you git._** . Then I took off my black leather bra and he took off his pants. We went on the bed and started making out naked Duh. **_Thanks for clearing that all up for us._** and then he put his boy's thingy in mine and we HAD SEX. (c is dat stupid?)**_Yes, Tara._

**"Oh Draco, Draco!" I screamed while getting an orgasm when all of a sudden I saw a tattoo I had never seen before on Draco's arm. It was a black heart with an arrow through it. On it in bloody gothic writing were the words… Vampire! . **_So… is that what the Dark Mark originally looked like? Tsk Tsk._

**I was so angry. **

**"You bastard!" I shouted angrily, jumping out of the bed. **_Tattoo or not, I would not jump out of the bed in the middle of having sex with Draco Malfoy. We could deal with that issue later. Or… just have more sex. Ahem. I'm a perv :3_

**"No! No! But you don't understand!" Draco pleaded. But I knew too much. "No, you fucking idiot!" I shouted. "You probably have AIDs anyway!" **_He has a tattoo, and now he has AIDS. _**I put on my clothes all huffily and then stomped out. Draco ran out even though he was naked. He had a really big you-know-what **_Dick? SAY THE WORD, BIMBO!_**. but I was too mad to care. **_And yet you mentioned it._** I stomped out and did so until I was in Vampire's classroom where he was having a lesson with Professor Snape and some other people. "VAMPIRE POTTER, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!" I yelled. **

_Daniel Ratcliffe and Tom Felton are probably so happy that you made them have sex -not-. I, on the other hand… Well, Petrificus Totalus works just as well as a slap to the face. _


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: stop flassing ok! **_Flassing. Not a word. Ok?_** if u do den u r a prep! **_Flass, flass, flass!_

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX **

**Everyone in the class stared at me and then Draco came into the room even though he was naked and started begging me to take him back. **_Naked Draco in class. Oh, oh… I would love to take that. Human Anatomy. Everyone pick your partner and STRIP EM DOWN!_

**"Ebony, it's not what you think!" Draco screamed sadly. **

**My friend B'loody Mary Smith smiled at me understatedly. **_Understated smile. Does that fit in with this situation? She understated you?_

**She flipped her long waste-length gothic black hair and opened her crimson eyes like blood that she was wearing contact lenses on. She had pale white skin that she was wearing white makeup on. **_This description is necessary how? _**Hermione **_Hermione? What?_** was kidnapped when she was born. . Her real parents are vampires and one of them is a witch but Voldemort killed her mother **_If I remember correctly, Hermione's parents are MUGGLE dentists. Not Magical Vampires that Voldemort murdered._** and her father committed suicide because he was depressed about it. She still has nightmares about it and she is very haunted and depressed. It also turns out her real last name is Smith and not Granger. **_If you say so. Hermione Smith, I don't like you._** (Since she has converted to Satanism she is in Slytherin now not Griffindor. **_Hermione is a vampire named B'loody Mary Smith, her parents are dead, and she is in Slytherin? Yes. This, my friends, was written sober._**) **

**"What is it that you desire, you ridiculous dimwit!" Snape demeaned angrily in his cold voice but I ignored him. **_He demeaned it. Wow._

**"Vampire, I can't believe you cheated on me with Draco!" I shouted at him. **

**Everyone gasped. **_Probably because you completely KILLED Harry Potter and it's dignity. Poor J.K Rowling._

**I don't know why Ebony was so mad at me. **_Is this the part where she was hacked? Or did she just suddenly decide to change the POV on us?_** I had went out with Vampire (I'm bi and so is Ebony) . for a while but then he broke my heart. He dumped me because he liked Britney **_SPEARS_**, a stupid preppy fucker. . We were just good friends now. He had gone through horrible problems, and now he was gothic. (Haha, like I would hang out with a prep.) . **_This part has to be hacked. There are too many correctly spelled words there. _

**"But I'm not going out with Draco anymore!" said Vampire. **

**"Yeah fucking right! Fuck off, you bastard!" I screamed. **

**I ran out of the room and into the Forbidden Forest where I had lost my virility to Draco and then I started to bust into tears. **_Virility? I'm sure if you lose YOUR MASCULINITY that you need to go to a doctor. Or… something. Women aren't… well… never mind._


	9. Chapter 9

_AN: stop flaming ok! I dntn red all da boox! __**I haven't read ALL the books either, and I still know what I'm talking about more than you do! **_**dis is frum da movie ok **_You haven't seen the movies either then._** . so itz nut my folt if dumbeldor swers! . besuizds I SED HE HAD A HEDACHE! and da reson snap dosent lik harry now is coz hes christian and vampire is a satanist! MCR ROX! **_Don't be so prejudiced. Snape doesn't like anybody. Harry is not a Satanist, My Chemical Romance isn't all THAT great, and you are RETARDED. _

**XXXXXXXX**

**I was so mad and sad. I couldn't believe Draco for cheating on me. I began to cry against the tree where I did it with Draco **_Yeah, whenever I'm upset with an ex, I ALWAYS go to the places we had sex to cry. Brilliant. _

**Then all of a suddenly, an horrible man with red eyes and no nose and everything started flying towards me on a broomstick! . **_Why, hello, Lord Voldemort. Pray tell me you are here to kill her. _**He didn't have a nose **_You just said that._** (basically like Voldemort in the movie **_We all know Voldemort looks like Voldemort_**) and he was wearing all black but it was obvious he wasn't gothic. It was… Voldemort! **_No shit!_

**"No!" I shouted in a scared voice ". but then Voldemort shouted "Imperius!" and I couldn't run away. "Crookshanks!" **_KITTY!_** I shouted at him. Voldemort fell of his broom **_Which he doesn't have_** and started to scream **_He shouted the Imperius Curse… meaning- HE TOOK CONTROL OF YOU… and you throw a poor kitty at his face._

**I felt bad for him even though I'm a sadist so I stopped. **_Not a sadist if you show mercy._

**"Ebony." he yelled. "Thou must kill Vampire Potter!" **_Thou art retarded._

**I thought about Vampire and his sexah eyes and his gothic black hair and how his face looks just like Joel Madden. . I remembered that Draco had said I didn't understand, so I thought, what if Draco went out with Vampire before I went out with him and they broke up? **_You are standing in the same area as Lord Voldemort, and you start thinking about Harry and Draco?_

**"No, Voldemort!" I shouted back. Voldemort gave me a gun. "No! Please!" I begged. . **_Voldemort gives out guns. Get your pistol here. _

**"Thou must!" he yelled. "If thou does not, then I shall kill thy beloved Draco!" **

**"How did you know?" **_How did he know you were a slutty whore fucking Draco? Word gets around, I hear._** I asked in a surprised way. Voldemort got a dude-ur-so-retarded look on his face. **_Well, his look was accurate._

**"I hath telekinesis." **_the ability to MOVE objects._** ... he answered cruelly. "And if you doth not kill Vampire, then thou know what will happen to Draco!" he shouted. Then he flew away angrily on his broomstick. **

**I was so scared and mad I didn't know what to do. Suddenly Draco came into the woods. **_Draco to the rescue!_

**"Draco!" I said. "Hi!" **_You were just mad at him… Don't talk to Draco Malfoy!_

**"Hi." he said back but his face was all sad. He was wearing white foundation and messy eyeliner kind of like a pentagram (geddit) **_What I don't get is why you wrote this._** between Joel Madden and Gerard Way. **_That is one homely kid. _

**"Are you okay?" I asked. **

**"No." he answered. **

**"I'm sorry I got all mad at you but I thought you cheated on me." I expelled. **

**"That's okay." he said all depressed and we went back into Hogwarts together making out. **_This is twisted. Draco… I think you need to go back home to mommy and daddy. _

_My god brother and I were reading this together, and he thinks that Tara wrote this as a joke. You guys would tell me if my stories started to suck, wouldn't you? I would take all the flames in the UNIVERSE if I wrote anything like Tara. _

_*Reminds self to change a few things in her stories. _


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: stup it u gay fags if u donot lik ma story den fukk off! ps it turnz out b'loody mary isn't a muggle afert al n she n vampire r evil datz y dey movd houses ok! **_They changed houses against their own will… and Hermione is not a vampire. Never._** XXXXXXXXXXXXXX **

**I was really scared about Vlodemort **_Vlodemort? Okay. The list of different names for people shall commence now._** all day. **

**I was even upset went to rehearsals with my gothic metal band Bloody Gothic Rose 666. **_That doesn't surprise me at all. What do you sing about? Rainbow shitting ponies?_

**I am the lead singer of it and I play guitar. **_Oh Merlin's Beard. My ears might ooze blood._

**People say that we sound like a cross between GC, Slipknot and MCR. **_That is one fucked up mixture. I was right about ears oozing blood._**.**

**The other people in the band are B'loody Mary, Vampire, Draco, Ron (although we call him Diabolo now. He has black hair now with blue streaks in it. **_What in Godric's name, did you do to Ronald Weasely?_**) and Hargrid. **_Hagrid, you are not a pedo, she only wants you to be. _

**Only today Draco and Vampire were depressed so they weren't coming and we wrote songs instead. **_They didn't come because for once, Ron and Draco agreed on something._

**I knew Draco was probably slitting his wrists **_His parents will hear about this._** (he wouldn't die because he was a vampire too and the only way you can kill a vampire is with a c-r-o-s-s **_No. There are more ways, according to various authors. Walk to the light, Tara, it will turn you into ashes… I mean… save you._** (there's no way I'm writing that) **_You just wrote it. _**or a steak and Vampire was probably watching a depressing movie like The Corpse Bride. **_If that's the same movie I'm thinking about, then I didn't think it was THAT depressing._** .**

**I put on a black leather shirt that showed off my boobs **_Because we totally like your boobage and shit._** and tiny matching miniskirt that said Simple Plan on the butt. **_They… no… why… fuck it. _**You might think I'm a slut but I'm really not. **_I still think it, and you still are._

**We were singing a cover of 'Helena' and at the end of the song I suddenly bust into tears. **_I bust into laughter every time you spell a word wrong._

**"Ebony! Are you OK?" B'loody Mary asked in a concerted voice. . **_I hate when people ask me if I'm okay when I'm crying._

**"What the fuck do you think?" I asked angrily. **_Wait for it…_** And then I said. "Well, Voldemort came and the fucking bastard told me to fucking kill Harry! But I don't want to kill him, because, he's really nice, even if he did go out with Draco. **_No, you want to fuck him, and if he's dead, you can't do it._** But if I don't kill Harry, then Voldemort, will fucking kill Draco!" I burst into tears. **

**Suddenly Draco jumped out from behind a wall. **_Draco, what the hell are you doing hiding behind walls?_

**"Why didn't you fucking tell me!" he shouted. "How could you- you- you fucking poser muggle bitch!" (c is dat out of character?) **_Yes, just a tad._

**I started to cry and cry. Draco started to cry too all sensitive. **_Draco crying. He doesn't cry that much… and when he does, it's definitely not because YOU are crying. _

**Then he ran out crying. **_You just told us he was crying. So do you need to remind us two seconds later?_** We practiced for one more hour. **_Draco runs out crying, and you heartlessly practice more. Bitch. GO AFTER YOUR MAN._

**Then suddenly Dumbeldore walked in angrily! **_What did you do to him this time?_** His eyes were all fiery and I knew this time it wasn't cause he had a headache. **_I like to think he has one, thanks to your music. _

**"What have you done!" He started to cry wisely. **_Wisely crying. I want to know how that's possible._** . (c dats basically nut swering and dis time he wuz relly upset n u wil c y) "Ebony Draco has been found in his room. He committed suicide by slitting his wrists." **_Ah, plot twist._


	11. Chapters 11 to 21

_I decided to pair the rest of these chapters up into groups. These are chapters 11-21_

_I will do this for two more groups. I don't know if the story actually stops at chapter 38, but that's as far as i got. so please enjoy the rest of the commentary._

_Thank Godric i do not own this story, My Immortal_

**AN: i sed stup flaming up prepz! c if dis chaptr is srupid!1111 **_YOU'RE SRUPID!1111_** it delz wit rly sris issus! sp c 4 urself if itz ztupid brw fangz 2 ma frend raven 4 hleping me! **_RAVEN, I want an explanation._

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**"NO!" I screamed. **

**I was horrorfied! **

**B'loody Mary tried to comfort me but I told her fuck off and I ran to my room crying myself. **_She was just trying to help, selfish slut._

**Dumbledore chased after me shouting **_Dumbledore doesn't chase people. Why would he chase you?_** . but he had to stop when I went into my room cause he would look like a perv that way **_You're a perv for thinking about it._**.**

**Anyway, I started crying tears of blood and then I slit both of my wrists. **_Bloody tears with a side of chopped up wrists. Delightful._

**They got all over my clothes so I took them off and jumped into the bath angrily while I put on a Linkin Park song at full volume. **_If I tried to jump into the tub angrily, I would most likely twist my ankle and end up angrily jumping back out to twist the other._

**I grabbed a steak and almost stuck it into my heart to commit suicide. **_I would like a steak right now. Where's my A1 sauce?_

**I was so fucking depressed! **

**I got out of the bathtub and **_the hair dryer fell in and electrocuted you_** put on a black low-cut dress with lace all over it sandly. **_DAMN!_

**I put on black high heels with pink metal stuff on the ends and six pairs of skull earrings. **_Pink metal stuff? Yeah. I wear it all the time. Especially with my lime green metal suit._

**I couldn't fucking believe it. Then I looked out the window and screamed… Snap was spying on me and he was taking a video tape of me! And Loopin was masticating to it! **_Snap, I order you to tell Loopin to stop MASTICATING on my front lawn. I'm tired of stepping in unknown substances._** They were sitting on their broomsticks. **_Masturbation on a broom stick. Yeah. Uhm. Remus John Lupin, you just wait until Nymphadora hears about your late night fiascos outside of little goffik girls' bedrooms. _

**"EW, YOU FUCKING PERVS, STOP LOOKING AT ME NAKED! ARE YOU PEDOS OR WHAT!" **_You… you… oh bloody hell._** Probably. I screamed putting on a black towel with a picture of Marilyn Mason on it. Suddenly Vampire ran in. **_The last thing I wanna see when I get out of the bath is a Marilyn Manson towel. I'd be afraid it would eat me._

**"Abra Kedavra!" **_Avada… Avada you little bitch. You can at least get that right._** he yelled at Snape and Loopin pointing his womb. **_I pointed my womb at my doctor, and he told me I needed to have immediate surgery._** I took my gun and shot Snape and Loopin a gazillion **_I would like to know how a gazillion bullets fit into a gun… and how you got that many bullets in the first place._** times and they both started screaming and the camera broke. **_The camera. I bet it's happy to be broke._

**Suddenly, Dumblydore **_DU MBLYDORE BAHAHAHA._** ran in. "Ebony, it has been revealed that someone has - NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he shouted looking at Snape and Loopin **_I twitch every time she spells Lupin Loopin. I want to lunge at her throat._** and then he waved his wand and suddenly… Hargrid ran outside on his broom and said everyone we need to talk. **_Running on a broom, the newest way to shed those love handles!_

**"What do you know, Hargrid? You're just a little Hogwarts student!" **_Hagrid is not a student, I don't care IF you changed him or whatever, and he certainly isn't LITTLE. _

**"I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT…." Hargirid paused angrily. "BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!" **_MERLIN'S BEARD YOU SPELLED IT RIGHT! _

**"This cannot be." Snap **_crackle pop. Or my favourite, Snapple!_** said in a crisp voice as blood dripped from his hand where Dumblydore's wand had shot him. **_People, wands now hold bullets. _

**"There must be other factors." **_Yeah, Fear Factor. _

**"YOU DON'T HAVE ANY!" I yelled in madly. Loopin held up the camera triumelephantly. **_You shot Lupin, you idiot._** "The lens may be ruined but the tape is still there!" **_CHA-CHING! Another Paris Hilton in the world. _

**I felt faint, more than I normally do like how it feels when you do not drink enough blood. . **_I know EXACTLY how that feels. _

**"Why are you doing this?" Loopin said angrily while he rubbed his dirty hands on his clook. **_Clook. Clook. Fook. Pattern. Boo. _

**And then I heard the words that I had heard before but not from him. I did not know whether to feel shocked and happy or to bite him and drink his blood because I felt faint. . **_Then pass out, preferably where you can slip out of the window and fall to your death on the ground. _

**"BECAUSE…BECAUSE…." Hargid said and he paused in the air dramitaclly, waving his wand in the air. Then swooped he in singing to the tune of a gothic version of a song by 50 Cent. **_Hagrid, where did you hear 50 cent, and can I please Stupefy the person responsible. Fff, rapping Hagrid I cant picture that at all._

**"Because you're goffic?" Snap**_ple_** asked in a little afraid voice cause he was afraind it meant he was connected with Satan. **_Snape was afraid so that means he's connected to Satan?_

**"Because I LOVE HER!" **_Wow, Slut._

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><p><strong>AN: stop f,aing ok hargrid is a pedo 2 a lot of ppl in amerikan skoolz r lik dat <strong>_that's only a LITTLE true. Pedophiles lurk in the neighborhoods mostly. Hagrid, well, he's not one of them._** I wunted 2 adres da ishu! how du u no snap iant kristian **_Because J.K. Rowling didn't tell us his religious background._**. plus hargrid isn't really in luv wif ebony dat was sedric ok! **_Where the FUCK did Cedric Diggory come from? He has better sense. _

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

**I was about to slit my wrists again with the silver knife that Drago **_Drago?_** had given me in case anything happened to him. **_Draco doesn't give presents to sluts._

**. He had told me to use it valiantly **_Use yer knives VALIANTLY folks, otherwise, you suck._** against an enemy but I knew that we must both go together. **_Goody gumdrops. _

**"NO!" I THOUGHT IT WAS HAIRgrid **_Hairgrid? Haha, that makes me think of something weird. Really weird._** but it was Vampire. **

**He started to scream. "OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!" and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his red whites. **_A couple notes: you, in the beginning, told us that Harry's scar somehow miraculously disappeared, and now, it's back? And, what the hell are red whites?_

**I stopped. "How did u know?" ! **_How did he know what? What did he know that we don't?_

**"I saw it! And my scar turned back into the lightning bolt!" **

**"NO!" I ran up closer. "I thought you didn't have a scar anymore!" I shouted. **_That's what I thought._

**"I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram **_Pentagram scar?_** for me and I always cover it up with foundation." **_The white stuff, I'm assuming._** he said back. **

**"Anyway my scar hurt and it turned back into the lightning bolt! Save me! **_Necessary?_** then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco….Volfemort has him bondage!" **_Volfemort! Haha!_

**Anyway I was in the school nurse's office now recovering from my slit wrists. **_You skipped a bunch of shit there, didn't you?_

**Snap**_ple_** and **_Froot_** Loopin and HAHRID were there too. **

**. They were going to St. Mango's **_St. Mangos, where the sweetest Mangos grow year-long!_** after they recovered cause they were pedofiles and you can't have those fucking pervs teaching in a school with lots of hot gurlz. **_not all the girls are hot. For one, I don't think Cho Chang is so cute after breaking Harry's heart._** Dumbledore had constipated **_he ate too many licorice wands_** the cideo camera they took of me naked. I put up my middle finger at them. **_I put my middle finger up at this story. _

**Anyway Hargrid came into my hospital bed holding a bouquet of pink roses. **_D'aw._

**"Enoby I need to tell u somethnig." he said in a v. serious voice, giving me the roses. **

**"Fuck off." I told him. "You know I fucking hate the color pink anyway, **_Okay. When did this happen? You wear pink fishnet, ink metal stuff, and the inside of your coffin is HOT PINK! You telling me you suddenly HATE pink?_** and I don't like fucked up preps like you. **_Yes, Hagrid as a prep. Picture him in Bermuda shorts with a sweater draped around his neck._**" I snapped. Hargrid had been mean to me before for being gottik. **

**"No Enoby." Hargrid says. "Those are not roses." **_What the hell are they then, HAIRGRID?_

**"What, are they goffs too you poser prep?" **_Someone be so kind as to translate this._** I asked cause I was angry that he had brought me pink roses. **

**"I saved your life!" He yelled angrily. **

**"No you didn't I replied." **

**"You saved me from getting a Paris Hilton p- video made from your shower scene and being vued by Snap**_ple_** and **_Froot_** Loopin." Who MASTABATED (c is dat speld rong). **_Yes, Masturbated is STILL spelled wrong_** to it he added silently. **

**"Whatever!" I yelled angirly. **

**He pointed his wand at the pink roses. "These aren't roses." **

**He suddenly looked at them with an evil look in his eye and muttered Well If you wanted Honesty that's all you haD TO SAY! **

**"That's not a spell that's an MCR song." I corrected him wisely. **_I only have one My Chemical Romance song in my play list, so I wouldn't know._

**"I know, I was just warming up my vocal cordes." how wonderful. **_Hagrid, really?_

**Then he screamed. "Petulus merengo mi kremicli romacio(4 all u cool goffic mcr fans out, there, that is a tribute! specially for raven I love you girl!)imo noto okayo!" **_I beto you're noto okayo!_

**And then the roses turned into a huge black flame floating in the middle of the air. And it was black. **_Which you already stated in the previous sentence. _**Now I knew he wasn't a prep. **_Because the flame was black?_

**"OK I believe you now wtf is Drako?" **_Drako: Draco Malfoy's counterpart created by Tara Gillespie. He wears extremely black clothes, with black eyeliner and red colored contacts. He likes MCR, Good Charlotte's Web and Joel Madden. Not the real Draco Malfoy. So, fuck off, you muggle bitch! _

**Hairgrid **_HAIR HAIR HAIR HAIR_** rolled his eyes. I looked into the balls of flame but I could c nothing. **

**"U c, Enobby," Dumblydore said, **_Dumblydore made an entrance without me knowing it. These people have a habit of just appearing._** watching the two of us watching the flame. "2 c wht iz n da flmes(HAHA U REVIEWRS FLAMES GEDDIT **_Sure, we are all laughing. That's right._**) u mst find urslf 1st, k?" **

**"I HAVE FOUND MYSELF OK YOU MEAN OLD MAN!" Hargrid yelled. **

**dUMBLydore lookd shockd. I guess he didn't have a headache or else he would have said something back. **_Dumblydore with a headache was so much fun, why take that away?_

**Hairgrid stormed off back into his bed. **_Wait a minute._** "U r a liar, prof dumbledoree!" **

**Anyway when I got better I went upstairs and put on a black leather minidress **_White is a colour too, why don't you try it?_** that was all ripped on the ends with lace on it. There was some corset stuff on the front. Then I put on black fishnets and black high-heeled boots with pictures of Billie Joe Armstrong **_BJA on boots?_** on them. I put my hair all out around me so I looked like Samara from the Ring (if u don't know who she iz ur a prep so fuk off!) **_you are already scary enough_** and I put on blood-red lipstick, black eyeliner and black lip gloss. **_You put black lip gloss over the red lipstick? _

**"You look kawai, girl." B'loody Mary said sadly. **_Kawaii means cute, for those of you that don't know. _**"Fangs (geddit) **_Yes. You're a slutty vampire, we got that._** you do too." I said sadly too **_You look cute, but im'ma say it all depressed because I'm goffik, you fukn prep._**, but I was still upset. **

**I slit both of my wrists feeling totally depressed and I sucked all the blood. . I cried again in my bathroom and put the shades on so Snap**_ple_** and **_Froot_** Loopin couldn't spy on me this time. I went to some classes. Vampire was in the Hair of Magical Magic Creatures. **_Heir of Magical Magic Creatures. Way to live Harry. You're supposed to be an Auror (excuse me if I sound ridiculous with that last statement. I'm fairly new to HP. Still learning the more I read D:)_

**He looked all depressed because Draco had disappeared and he had used to be in love with Draco **_Draco and Vampire sitting in a tree K-I-L-L-I-N-G… who? YOU!_**. He was sucking some blood from a Hufflepuff. . **_So that's what happened to Cedric! _

**"Hi." he said in a depressed way. **

**"Hi back." I said in an wqually said way. **_*facepalm*_

**We both looked at each other for some time. Harry had beautiful red gothic eyes so much like Dracos. Then… we jumped on each other and started screwing each other.. **_This is definitely not the time to be screwing Draco's 'ex', horny whore. _

**"STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!" **_that's better._** shouted Professor McGoggle, **_Pfft, McGoggle?_** who was watching us and so was everyone else. **_They get off on stuff like this. _

**"Vampire you fucker!" I said slapping him. "Stop trying to screw me. You know I loved Draco!" **_You jumped on Harry too!_** I shouted and then I ran away angrily. **

**Just then he started to scream. "OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!" and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his red whites. **

**"NO!" I ran up closer. **_To fuck him some more._

**"I thought you didn't have a scar anymore!" I shouted. **_You asked him that before… _

**"I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation." **_Harry, don't repeat yourself, it's annoying._** he said back. "Anyway my scar hurt and then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco….Volfemort has him bondage!" **_DRACO IN BONDAGE WHERE'S MY CAMERA. *coughcough* I just want to see Draco naked. _

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX **

**SPECIAL FANGZ 2 RAVEN MY GOFFIX BLOOD SISTA WTF UR SUPPOZD 2 RIT DIS!11111111 **_You say thanks, then you… bah… what the bloody hell._

**HEY RAVEN DO U KNOW WHERE MY SWEATER IS **_No, she doesn't. _

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><p><strong>AN: raven fangz 4 gelpin me agen im sory ah tok ur postr of gerard but dat guy is such a fokin sexbom! <strong>_I need to look up this Gerard Way person… _**PREPZ STOP FLAMIGNG! **

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**Vampire and I ran up the stairs looking for Dumbledore. **

**We were so scared. **

**"Dumbledore Dumblydore!" we both yelled. Dumbledore came there. **

**"What is it that you want now you despicable snobs?" he asked angrily. **_Despicable! _

**"Volsemort has Draco!" we shouted at the same time. **_New name: Volsemort._

**He laughed in an evil voice. **_Pfft. _

**"No! Don't! We need to save Draco!" we begged. **

**"No." he said meanly. "I don't give a darn what Voldemort does to Draco. **_Npw, now, Albus, that's not very nice of you._** Not after how much he misbehaved in school **_the hotties are supposed to get away with that type of behavior_** especially with YOU Ebony. **_Well, okay, when you blame her, that makes it a little better. She did turn him into a goffik freak._**" he said while he frowned looking at me. **

**"Besides I never liked him that much anyway." then he walked away. **_Dumbledore likes everyone. Psht, he wasn't even mad at Draco when he tried to kill him. _

**Vampire started crying. "My Draco!" he moaned. (AN: don't u fik gay guyz r lik so hot!) **

**"Its okay!" I tried to tell him but that didn't stop him. He started to cry tears of blood. **_Tears of Blood, eh? That sounds bothersome. And a little too True Blood. _

**Then he had a brainstorm. "I had an idea!" he exclaimed. **_ME TOO! LET'S ALL GET TARA!_

**"What?" I asked him. **

**"You'll see." he said. **

**He took out his wand and did a spell. Then… suddenly we were in **_CANDY MOUNTAIN CHARLIE!_** Voldemprt's lair! **_Why did we have to go there?_

**We ran in with our wands out just as we heard a croon voice say. "Allah Kedavra!" **_Twitch. _**It was….. Voldemort! **_:D GET HER VOLDY! _

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><p><strong>AN: fuk off PREPZ ok! Raven fangz 4 helpin agen. im sory ah kudnt update but I wuz derperessd n I had 2 go 2 da hospital kuz I slit muh rists. <strong>_What did the doctors tell you?_** PS im nut updating til u giv me 10 god revoiws! . **_God reviews? Aw, poor God. _

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX **

**WARNING: SUM OF DIS CHAPTA IS XTREMLY SCRAY. VIOWER EXCRETION ADVISD. **_Special Victims Unit. _

**We ran to where Volcemort was. It turned out that Voldemort wasn't there. Instead the fat guy who killed Cedric was. **_Pettigrew~_

**Draco was there crying tears of blood. Snaketail **_No, bitch, Peter is WORMTAIL! Ask Lupin._** was torturing him. Vampire and I ran in front of Snaketail. **

**"Rid my sight you despicable preps!" he shouted as we started shooting him with the gun **_Guns… what the fuck up with the guns? Wands are so much better._** he Then suddenly he looked at me and he fell down with a lovey-dovey look in his eyes. **_Peter, don't you do it._

**"." he said. (in dis he is sixteen yrs old so hes not a pedofile ok) **_So, Peter is still a Marauder at this point? You called him fat. He just wants to fuck you. _

**"Huh?" I asked."Enoby I love you will you have sex with me?" **_Shit, I was right. _**asked Snaketail. I started laughing crudely. "What the fuck? You torture my bf and then you expect me to fuck you? God, you are so fucked up you fucking bastard." **_It works with almost everyone else._** I said angrily. Then I stabbed him in the heart. Blood pored out of it like a fountain. **_Squeamish. I hate the image my mind gave me._

**"Nooooooooooooo!" he screamed. He started screaming and running around. Then he fell down and died. I brust into tears sadly. **_You stabbed him in the heart and he's running around? He had to run around a little before he died?_

**"Snaketail what art thou doing?" **_Dying._** called Voldemort. Then… he started coming! We could hear his high heels clacking to us. **_Voldemort in high heels. I wouldn't be able to take him seriously._** So we got on our broomsticks and we flew to Hogwarts. We went to my room. Vampire went away. There I started crying. **

**"What's wrong honey?" asked Draco taking off his clothes so we could screw. **_Poor Draco._** Knew it. He had a sex-pack (geddit cuz hes so sexah) **_Sex-pack. How original of you._** and a really huge you-know-what and everything. **_SAY THE WORD DICK, IT'S NOT THAT HARD TO DO. Oh my. Did any one else think of a lame joke after I said that?_

**"Its so unfair!" I yielded. "Why can't I just be ugly or plain like all da other girls and preps here except for B'loody Mary, because she's not ugly or anything." **_You are ugly. Because you look like a prostitute. _

**"Why would you wanna be ugly? I don't like the preps anyway. They are such fucking sluts." answered Draco. **

**"Yeah but everyone is in love with me! Like Snape and **_Froot_** Loopin took a video of me naked. Hargrid says he's in love with me. Vampire likes me and now even Snaketail is in love with me! **_But you stabbed him in the heart. A simple… No… would have donw._** I just wanna be with you ok Draco! Why couldn't Satan have made me less beautiful?". **_Satan would reject you. _

**I shouted angrily. (an" don't wory enoby isn't a snob or anyfing but a lot of ppl hav told her shes pretty) "Im good at too many things! WHY CAN'T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT'S A FUCKING CURSE!" I shouted and then I ran away. **_Again: running away vs. sex with Draco. I would have to chose sex. _

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><p><strong>AN: stup flaming ok! btw u suk frum no on evry tim sum1 flams me im gona slit muh ristsz! <strong>_How do you even have friends?_** fangz 2 raven 4 hlpein! **

**XXXXXXXXXXXX **

**"Ebony Ebony!" shouted Draco sadly. "No, please, come back!" **

**But I was too mad. **

**"Whatever! Now u can go anh have sex with Vampire!" **_NO. Have sex with… never mind._** I shouted. **

**I stormed into my room and closed my black door with my blood-red key. It had a picture of Marylin Manson **_That's one horrid key._** on it. **

**He looked so sexy in a way that reminded me of Draco and Vampire.. I started to cry and weep. I took a razor and started to slit my wrists. **_You would think she wouldn't have anywhere else on her wrists to slit._** I drank the blood all depressed. Then I looked at my black GC watch and noticed it was time to go to Biology class. **_Biology? What class is she referring to?_

**I put on a short ripped black gothic dress that said Anarchy on the front in blood red letters and was all ripped and a spiky belt. **_UNIFORMS DAMMIT!_** Under that I put on ripped black fishnets and boots that said Joel all over them with blood red letters. **

**I put my ebony black hair out. Anyway I went downstairs feeling all sad and depressed as usual. . I did sum advanced Biology work. I was turning a bloody pentagram into a black guitar. **_Oh… okay, so you meant Transfiguration?_** Suddenly the guitar turned to Draco! **_I want a guitar that turns into Draco. I would play it all day long. (geddit? Lmao, couldn't resist.)_

**"Enoby I love you!" he shouted sadly. "I dnot care what those fucker preps and posers fink. **_You are prejudiced._** Ur da most beautiful girl in the world. **_You are brainwashed._** Before I met you I used to want to commit suicide **_No, that never happened. Before you met her, you were better._** all the time. Now I just wanna fucking be with you. I fucking love you!." **_What he really said: "I wouldn't dare waste my time with a filthy Mudblood like you! Stay out of my way, or my father will hear about this." _

**Then…. he started to sing "Da Chronicles of Life and Death" (we considered it our song now cuz we fell in love when Joel was singing it) **_That was when Draco noticed… you were an easy lay. Regrettable lay, but an easy one._** right in front of the entire class! His singing voice was so amazing and gothic and sexxy like a cross between Gerard, Joel, Chester, Pierre and Marilyn Manson (AN: don't u fink dos guyz r so hot. if u dnot no who dey r get da fuk out od hr! **

**"OMFG." I said after he was finished. Some fucking preps stared at us but I just stuck up my middle fingers (that were covered in black nail polish and were entwined with Draco's now) at them. "I love you!" I said and then we started to kiss just like Hilary Duff (i fukin h8 dat bitch) **_I don't like her either, but you don't see me telling he whole world I kiss like her_** and CMM in a Cinderella Story. Then we went away holding hands. **_Froot_** Loopin shouted at us but he stopped cuz everyone was clapping by how sexy we looked 2gether. Then I saw a poster saying that MCR would have a concert in Hogsmede **_Them Muggles…_** right then. We looked at each other all shocked and then we went 2gether.**

* * *

><p><strong>AN: u no wut! sut up ok! proov 2 me ur nut prepz! <strong>_I know I'm not a prep._** raven u suk u fuken bich gimme bak mah fukijn swteet **_your fucking what?_** ur supsd 2 rit dis! **_then why are you the one posting it?_** Raven wtf u bich ur suposd to dodis! BTW fangz 2 britney5655 4 techin muh japnese! **

**XXXXXXXXXXXX**

**We ran happily to Hogsmede. There we saw the stage where GC had played. We ran in happly. **_We ran happily… we ran happily… I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK!_** MCR were there playing 'Helena'. **

**I was so fucking happy! Gerard looked even sexier than he did in da pictures. Even Draco thought so, I could totally see him getting an erection **_Because you have a habit of staring at crotches? Lovely._** but it didn't matter cuz I knew know that we were da only true ones for eachother. **_If Draco got horny over a guy in front of me, there would be some confrontation._

**I was wearing a black leather minidress and black leather platinum boots with red ripped fishnets. **_The descriptions of what you wear are almost predictable now. Stop it. I don't care how much black you wear. _

**Draco was wearing a black baggy MCR t-shirt and black baggy pants. **

**Anyway, we stated moshing to Helena. We frenched. We ran up 2 the front of the band to stage-dive. Suddenly, Gerard pulled off his mask. So did the others. We gasped. It wasn't them at all. It was.,….. Volsemort and da Death Dealers! **_DEATH DEALERS! Step right up, ladies and gents! These lovely guys are dealing out death by the minute! Don't miss your chance!_

**"Wtf Draco im not going to a concert wid u!" I shouted angrily. "Not after what happened to me last time? Even if its MCR n u no how much I lik them." **_You already are at a concert with Draco._

**"What cause we…you know…" he gadgetted uncomfortbli cause guys don't like to talk a bout you-know-what. **_Guys talk about sex more than you can imagine. You must go to a private school for girls or something. But… even THEY know what guys talk about. _

**"Yeah cause we you know!" I yielded in an angry voice. **

**"We won't do that again." Draco promised. "This time, we're going with an ESCORT." **

**"OMFG wtf/ Are you giving into the mainstream?" I asked. "So I guess ur a prep or a Christina or what now?" **_From now on, I will no longer refer to my church goers as Christians. They are all now Christinas. _

**"NO." he muttered loudly.**_You cannot mutter loudly. That defeats the purpose of muttering._**. **

**"R u becoming a prep or what?" I shootd angrily. **_I shoot angrily all the time. Makes life fun._

**"Enoby! I'm not! Pls come with me!" He fell down to his knees and started singing 'Da world is black' by GC to me. **_Is this some sort of Gothic High School Musical? _

**I was flattened **_like a pancake_** cause that's not even a single, he had memorized da lyrks just 4 me! **

**"OK then I guess I will have to." I said and then we frenched 4 a while and I went up 2 my room. **

**B'loody Mary was standing there. "**

**Hajimemashite gurl." she said happily (she spex Japanese so do i. dat menz 'how do u do' in japanese). **

**"BTW Willow that fucking poser got expuld. **_Poor little Willow._** she failed al her klasses and she skepped math." (an: RAVEN U FUKIN SUK! FUK U!) **_Raven, I don't know why you continue to help her._

**"It serves that fuking bich right." I laughed angrily. **

**Well anyway we where felling all deprezzed. We wutsched some goffic movies like Das niteMARE b4 xmas. "Maybe Willow will die too." I said. **

**"Kawai." **_Like omg, did you see how that Muggle died the other day? It was like totally kawaii, girlfriend._** B'loody Mair shook her head enrgtically lethrigcly. "Oh yeah o have a confession after she got expuld I murdered her and den **_froot_** loopin did it with her cause he's a necphilak." **

**"Kawai." **_Necrophilia is also kawaii, donchuknow?_** I commnted happily . We talked to each other in silence for da rest uv da movie. **_Can't you just say you whispered? Saves a lot of trouble. _

**"OH HEY BTw, im going to a concert with drako tonight in Hogsmeade with mcr." I sed. " I need to wear like da hotset outfit EVA." **_nothing, I repeat, NOTHING you wear is HOT. _

**B'Loody Mairy Nodded ENREGeticALLlY. "Omfg totally lets go shopping." **

**"In Hot Topic, right?" I asked, already getting out my spshcial Hot Topic Loiyalty carde. **_Hot Topic. Your Friend With Benefits. _

**"No." My head snaped up. **

**'WHAT?" my head spuin. I could not believe it. "B'Loody Mary are u a PREP?" **_Just because someone doesn't buy every piece of clothing from Hot Topic doesn't make them a prep. _

**"NOOOO!NOOOO!" She laughed. "I found some cool goffic stores near Hogwarts that's all." **

**"Hu told u abut them" I askd sure it would be Drako or Diabolo or Vampire(Or me. **

**"Dumblydore." She sed. "Let me just call our broms." **

**"OMFFG DUMBLYDORE?" I asked quietly. **_Dumblydore. Makes me giggle every time._

**"Yah I saw the map for Hogsmeade on his desk." She told me. "Come on let's go." **

**We were going in a few punkgoff stores SPECIALLY for the concerts in Hogsmeade. The salesperson was OMG HOTTER THAN GERARD EXCEPT NOT CAUSE THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE **_then what the fuck did you say it for?_** and he gave me a few dresses. "We only have these for da real goffs."**

**"Da real goffs?" Me and B'Loody Mary asked. **_Yeah, I mean, like, you're a POSER PREP! Le gasp._

**"Yah u wouldn't believe how many posers **_BAHAHA._** ther are in this town man! Yesterday **_froot_** loopin and snap tried to buy a goffic camera pouch. **_there is such a thing as a gothic camera pouch?_**" He shook his head. "I dint even no they had a camera." **_does it even matter if you know?_

**"OMFG NO THEIR GONNA SPY ON ME AGAIN!" I cried, running out of the changing room wearing a long black dress with lots of red tulle coming out and very low-cut with a huge slit. **_we didn't know you were in there._

**"Oh my satan you have to buy that outfit" The salesperson said. **_I don't like the name satan. It gives me the willies. I'm a Christian. No… wait. I am a Christina. (no, really, I am a Christian xD not trying to offend anyone)_

**"Yeah it looks totlly hot." said B'Loody Mary. **_Hermione… I keep forgetting that B'Loody Mary is you. _

**"You know what I am gona give it to you free cause u look really hot in that utfit. Hey are you gonna be at the concert tonight?" he asked. **_Hot Topic didn't give me my Kingdom Hearts stuff to me for free, why does the goffik get her slut clothes for free?_

**"Yeah I am actually." I looked back at him. "Hey BTW my name's ebondy dark'ness dementia TARA way what's yours?" **_She casually slipped Tara in there. As if we didn't already know it was her. _

**"Tom Rid**_dle?_**." He said and ran a hand through his black-dyed hair. "maybe I'll see you there tonight." **

**"Yeah I don't think so cause I am going there with my bf drako you sick perv!" **_He's a perv because he said he might see you at the concert._** I yelled angrily, but before he could beg me to go with him, **_and you automatically assume every guy wants to fuck you _**Hargrid flew in on his black broom looking worried. "OMFG EBONDY U NEED OT GET BACK INTO THE CASTLE NOW!" **

_HI HAGRID!_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I sed stup flming da stryo! if ur a prep den dnot red it! u kin tel weder ur a prep or not by ma quiz itz on ma hompage. <strong>_I saw that quiz on the internet, and almost took it, but decided against it because… well, I didn't want to waste my time being told I'm a prep. (and yet, I waste my time doing commentary haha.)_** if ur not den u rok. if u r den FOOOOOK UFFFFFFFFFF! pz willo isn't rely a prep. Raven plz do dis il promis 2 giv u bak ur postr! **_She probably masticated on it. And we all know she gave Draco AIDS. _

**XXXXXXXXX**

**Tom Riddle gave us some clothes n stuff 4 free. **_Because all Hot Topics have that option._** He said he wud help us wif makeup if he wunted **_If HE wanted?_** koz he was relly in2 fashin n stuff. (hes bisezual **_Tom Riddle+fashion= what the fuck_** ). **

**Hargird kept shooting at us to cum back 2 Hogwarts. **

**"WTF Hargrid?" I shouted angrily. "Fuck off you fjucking bastard." **

**Well anyway Willow came. Hargird went away angrily. **_That was completely anti-climactic_

**"Hey bitch you look kawaii." she said. **_Hey slut, you look cute. Yeah. Okay, sluts are now cute. _

**"Yah but not as kawaii as you." I answered sadly cause Willow's really pretty and everything. **_This is poppycock, I tell you._

**She was wearing a short black corset-thingy with blood red lace on it and a blak blood-red **_how can something black also be red?_** miniskirt, leather fish-nets **_and WTF is a leather fishnet? Do they even make leather fishnet?_** and black poiny boots that showed off how pale she wuz. She had a really nice body wif big bobs and everything. She was thin enouff 2 be anorexic. **_No offense, but anorexia is never known to look good on anyone, no matter how pretty their face is. _

**"So r u going 2 da concert wif Draco?" she asked.**

**"Yah." I said happily. **_first sadly, then this. _

**"I'm gong with Diabolo." she anserred happily. **_Oooh, I'm telling Hermione~!_

**Well anyway Draco and Diabolo came. **

**They were both loking extremely hot and sexy and u could tell they thoufht we were ot 2. **_Draco Malfoy ALWAYS knows he's attractive._

**Diabolo was wearing a black t-shirt that said '666' on it. **_Lovely._

**He was wearing tons off makeup jus like Marylin Manson. **_Oh Ronald, what are you doing to yourself?_** Draco was wearing black leather pants, a gothic black GC t-shirt and black Vans he got from da Warped tower. **

**B'loody Mart was going 2 da concert wif Dracola **_Who is Dracula?_**. **

**Dracola used to be called Navel **_NEVILLE? YOU GAVE INTO THE DARKS SIDE? Out of all of them, I thought you would stay out of this story._** but it tuned out dat he was kidnapped at birth and his real family were vampires. **_Oh… wow. _

**They dyed **_their hair black and red_** in a car crash. **

**Navel converted to Satanism and he went goth. **_Not that I would know… but isn't that sort of the ending result?_

**He was in Slitherin now **_of course he was_**. **

**He was wearing a black Wurped t-shirt, black jeans and shoes and black hair wif red streekz in it**_ I totally saw that coming._**. We kall him Dracula now **_Blehhh~_

**Well anyway we al went 2 Draco's black Mercy-Bens (geddit cuz wer gpffik **_Geddit? Because no one cares._**)that his dad Lucian **_Lucius, you changed your name too? What will Cissy say?_** gave him. We did pot, coke and crak. **_Because all the Slytherin goffiks are doing it :D!_

**Draco and I made out. We made fun of dose stupid fuking preps. We soon got there….I gapsed.**

**Gerard was da sexiest guy eva **_I looked him up. There is NOTHING attractive about him. Seriously. If you think he'd hotter than Tom Felton, which I'm sure you do, then you really ARE on crack, and all that blood you lost from wrist slitting didn't help out your twisted little brain. And when I say little, I mean MICRO-FUCKING-SCOPIC._**! **

**He locked even sexier den he did in pix. **_I highly doubt that._** He had long raven blak hair n piercing blue eyes. He wuz really skinny and he had n amazing ethnic voice. **

**We moshed 2 Helena and sum odder songz. **

**Sudenly Gerard polled of his mask. **_He should have left that on. I won't comment on how you said he looked sexy with a mask on, however. _

**So did the other membez. I gasped. It wasn't Gerard at all! **_What?_** It was an ugly preppy man wif no nose and red eyes **_YOU THOUGHT VOLDY WAS SEXY ADMIT IT!_**... Every1 ran away but me and Draco. Draco and I came. It was….Vlodemort and da Death Deelers! **_Death Dealers. Gets me every time. _

**"U moronic idiots!" he shooted angstily. **

**"Enoby, I told u to kill Vampire. Thou have failed. And now….I shall kill thou and Draco!" **_Kill her, that's all you need to do. _

**"No no please!" We begged sadly but he took out his knife. **_Voldemort with a knife… _

**Sudenly a gothic old man flu in on his broomstick. He had lung black hair **_lung hair, ewww._** and a looong black bread. **_Sounds like a personal problem._** He wus werring a blak robe dat sed 'avril lavigne' on da back. **_Oh fuck… tell me this isn't-_** He shotted a spel and Vlodemort ran away. It was…DUMBLYDORE! **_You, goffik girl, should burn in the lake of fire for doing that to Albus Dumbledore. _

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I SED STUP FLAMMING! if u do den ur a fuken prep! <strong>_You need not be so mean to your readers, it might make them hate you. Oh, wait._** . fangz 2 raven 4 da help n stuf. u rok! n ur nut a prep. **_But you're a prep whenever you don't help her out._** fangz for muh sewter! ps da oder eson dumbeldor swor is koz he trin 2 be gofik so der! **_What did you just say?_

**XXXXXXXXXXXX**

**I woke up the next day in my coffin. **_You're so very informative._

**I walked out of it and put on some black eyeliner, black eyesharrow, blood-bed lipstick and a black really low-cut leather dress that was all ripped and in stripes so you could see my belly **_STRETCH MARK CITY! _**. **

**I was wearing a skull belly ring with black and red diamonds inside it. **_I am still not fully used to the fact that they are letting you stroll around Hogwarts in slut-fits. _

**(Da night before Draco and I rent back to the skull (geddit skull koz im goffik n I like deth). **_Where did that come from?_

**Dumbeldore chased Vlodemort away. **

**We flew there on our brooms. **

**Mine was black and the broom-stuff was blood-red. There was lace all over it. **_Yes, lacy brooms are so in this year._

**Draco had a black MCR boom. **_It can't get worse than Draco on an MCR broom, can it?_

**We went back to our rooms and we had you-know-what to a Linkin Park song.. **_I was wrong. _

**Well anyway I went down to the Grate Hall. **_Sigh. _

**There all da walls were painted black and da tables were black too. But you fould see that there was pink pant underneath the black pant. **_A pink Great Hall?_** And there were pastors **_Lol, I didn't know bands had pastors. Don't go singing songs about the devil guys. Your pastor will condemn you._** of poser bands everywhere, like Ashlee Simpson and the Backstreet Boys. **_Hey, bitch. There is NOTHING wrong with the Backstreet Boys. You crossed my line. Prepare for Ultra Bitch KagsChann. _

**"WTF!" I shouted going to sit next to B'loody Mary and Willow. **

**B'loody Mary was wearing a black leather mini with a Good Chraloote . t-shirt, black fishnets and black pointy boots. **

**Willow was wearing a long gothic blak dress with blood red writing that was all lacy and came up to your thighs **_My thighs? Since when did I start wearing prostitute clothes?_** and black boots and fishnets. Vampire, Dracula and Draco came. We started to talk about who was sexier, Mikey or Gerard Way or Billie Joe Armstrong. **_None of the above._** The boys joined in cause they were bi. **_You are an insolent, slimy, pessimistic, anorexic, slutty little git, aren't you?_

**"Those guys are so fucking hot." Navel **_Neville is a belly button, I just realized what navel meant. _** was saying as suddenly a gothic old man with a black beard and everything came. **_How the fuck?_

**He was the same one who had chassed away Vlodemort yesterday. **_So the gothic Dumbledore?_** He had normal tan skin but he was wearing white foundation and he had died his hare black. **_Tanned skin and WHITE foundation. You need to make up your mind._

**"….DUMBLEDORE?1!" we all gasped. **_NO FUCKING SHIT!_

**"WTF?" I shouted angrily. "I thought he was just wearing that to scare Volsemort!" **_He's just wearing that because you made him. _

**"Hello everyone." he said happily. **_Happy Gothic Dumbledore?_** "As u can see I gave the room a makeover. Whjat do u fink about it?" . **_I think Tara is possessed. _

**Everyone from the poser table in Gryiffindoor started to cheer. **

**Well we goths just looked at each other all disfusted and shook our heads. We couldn't believe what a poser he was!1. **_You… what… I …. FUCK IT ALL. _

**"BTW you can call me Albert." **_You can't call the Headmaster by his first name… Well, I guess you can't get in TOO much trouble for calling him Albert…_** HE CALLED AS WE LEFT to our classes.**

**"What a fucking poser!" Draco shouted angrily as we we to Transfomation. **

**We were holding hands. Vampire looked really jealous. I could see him crying blood in a gothic way (geddit, way lik Gerard) **_I'm sure Gerard Way cries blood all the time._** but I didn't say anything. "I bet he's havin a mid-life crisis!" Willow shouted. **_Dumbledore is 115, he had his mid-life crisis before you were thought of… Ah, those were the days. _

**I was so fucking angry. .**

* * *

><p><strong>im nut ok i promise <strong>_We know, we know. _

**AN: plz stup flaming da story if u do ur a foken prep n ur jelous ok!11 **_I'm totally jealous. Can't you tell? We all want to learn from the Almighty Tara Gillespie. Not._** frum noq un im gong 2 delt ur men reviowz!111 **_Do what?_** BTW evonyd a poorblod **_She can't be a pureblood… didn't someone call her a Mudblood earlier? I can't remember. That's how ridiculous and random this story is/was._** so der! 1 fangz 2 raven 4m da help!11 **

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX **

**All day we sat angerly finking about Dumbelldore.. We were so fucking pissed off. **

**Well, I had one thing to look forward too- da MCR concert. It had been postphoned, so we could all go. **_How many MCR concerts can one person handle?_

**Anyway, I went to the common room sadly to cut classes. Draco was being all secretive. **_Ah, Draco being secretive. He must be slowly turning back to normal._

**I asked what it was and he got all mad me and started crying all hot and angst **_Nevermind…_** (rnt sensitve bi guyz so hot). **

**"No one fucking understands me!1" he shouted angrily as his black hare went in his big blue eyes like Billie Joe in Boulevard of Borken Dreamz. **_I hate that song. _

**He was wearing black baggy paints, a black MCR t-shirt and a black die. **_You and your damn clothes descriptions._** (geddit insted of tie koz im goffik) **

**I was wearing a blak leather low cut top with chains all over it all over it **_…really?_** a blak leather mini, black high held boots and a cross belly fing. **_Cross belly things are worn by all the goffik gothics out there nowadays._** My hair was al up in a messy relly high bun like Amy Lee in Gong Under. (email me if u wana see da pik) **_I'll get right on that. _

**"Accuse me? **_I have. Trust me._** What about me!" I growled. **

**"Buy-but-but-" he grunted. **

**"You fucking bastard!" I moaned. **

**"No! Wait! It's not what it fucking looks like!" he shouted. **

**But it was to late. I knew what I herd. I ran to the bathroom angrily, cring. **

**Draco banged on the door. I whipped and whepped as my blody eyeliner streammed down my cheeks and made cool tears down my feces **_omg… feces XD _**like Benji in the video for Girls and Bois (raven that is soo our video! **_Like oh my fucking god! No one cares!_**). I TOOOK OUT A CIGARETE END STARTED TO smoke pot. **_Cigarettes and pot are not the same thing. _

**Suddenly Hargrid came. He had appearated. **_Which cannot be done without an enchantment lift under Dumbledore's permission. But in the shape he's in… I'm not sure what to say to that. _

**"You gave me a fucking shock!". I shouted angrily dropping my pot. **

**"Wtf do you fink you're doing in da gurl's room?" **_Coming to fuck you. _

**Only it wasn't just Hargrid. Someone else was with him too! For a second I wanted it 2 b Tom Rid or maybe Draco but it was Dumblydore. **_Hello, Dumblydore. Are you feeling better yet?_

**"Hey I need to ask you a question." he said, pulling out his black wanabe-goffik purse. **_Why does he have a purse? _**"What are u wearing to the concert?" **_No… please… no more clothes descriptions!_

**"U no who MCR r!" I gasped. **_That was not the right answer. You are the weakest link, goodbye._

**"No I just saw there was a concert dat a lot of gothz and punx were going 2." He said. "Anyway Draco has a surprise for u." **_Cliffhanger. Who else can guess what the surprise is?_

**AN: I sed I dnoty ker wut u fink! stof pflamin ok prepz!1 fangz 2 raven 4 da help!1 oh yah btw ill be un vacation in transilvania **_You mean cutting yourself._** 4 da nex 3 dayz so dnot expect updatz. **

**All day I wondered what the surprise was. **

**Meanwhile, **_Of course, here we go again._** I pot on a blak ledder mini, a blak corset with urple lace stuff all over it, an black gothic compact boots. **

**MCR were gong 2 do the concert again, since Volxemort had taken over the last one. I slit my wrists while I moshed **_Slitting and moshing? Oh-so multi talented!_** 2 MCR in my bedroom all night, feeling excited. **_You were excited to be bleeding?_

**Suddenly someone knocked on the door while I was trying on sum black clothes and moshing to Fang u 4 da Venom. I gut all mad and turned it of, but sacredly **_blinkblink_** I hopped inside dat it was Draco so we could do it again. **_I imagine you did. _

**"Wut de fucking hell r u doing!" I shouted angrily. It was **_Froot_** Loopin! **

**"R u gonna cum rape me or what." **_Why yes, Froot Loopin is after your Satanist body._** I yelled. I was allowed to say dat because Dumblydore had told us all 2 be careful around hem and Snap**_ple_** since he was a pedo. **_Snape and Lupin are pedophiles, and that gives you permission to swear?_

**"No, actshelly (geddit, hell **_Brilliant._**) kan I plz burrow sum condemns. **_Only if you promise to CONDEMN her. _**" he growld angrily. **

**"Yah, so u can fuk ur six-yr-old gurlfriend , huh?" **_I don't think Nymphadora is six._** I shouted sarkastikally.**

**"Fuker." He said, gong away. **_Way to go Froot Loopin!_

**Well anyway, I put on some black eyesharow, black eyeliner, and some black lipstick and white foundation. Then I went. **_Went… where?_

**Den I gasped….Snake and Loopin were in da middle of da empty hall, doin it, and Dobby was watching!1 **_Dobby! …wait… Snape and Lupin?_

**"Oh my god you ludacris idiot!" they both shooted **_BANG!_** angrily when they saw me. **

**Dobby ran away crying. **_I would have too. _

**Dey got up, though. **_Man-thingies out and errythang!_

**Normally I wood have ben turned on (I luv cing guyz do it **_Um… no. I like yaoi… but that is just something I will not watch_**) but both of them were fuking preps. **_Snape is most definitely a prep. Can't you see him in bright colours?_** (btw snake is movd 2 griffindoor **_I WILL COME TO YOUR HOUSE AND PUSH YOU OUT INTO THE SUNLIGHT WHERE YOU TURN INTO ASH LITTLE GIRL!_**)**

**"WTF is that why u wanted condoms?" I asked sadistically. (c I speld dat.)**_very good -clap-_

**"Only you wouldn't give them to me!" Lumpkin **_D'aw, Lumpkin._** shouted angrily. **

**"Well you shoulda told me." I replayed. **_What?_

**"You dimwit!." Snake began 2 shoot angrily **_Severus' got a gun, bum bum bum._**. **

**And then…I took out my black camera and took a pic of them. **_Cameras. The ultimate defense._** U could see that they were naked and everything. **_For shame. _

**"Well xcuse me!" they both shouted angrily. "What was dat al about?" **_She wants to masticate to your nakedness, guys. Masticate. That's right. _

**"It wuz to blackmail u." I snarked. **_Snarked? _

**"So now next time you see me doing it with my boyfriend you cant fuking rat me out or I'll show dis to Dumbledork. So fuck off, u bastards!" I started to run. **

**They chased me but I threw my wound **_Ah._** at them and dey tripped over it. Well anyway, I went outside and there was Vampire, looking extremely fucking hot. **_Oh god, she's going to screw him. _

**"WTF where'd Draco?" I asked him.**

**"Oh he's bein a fucking bastard. He told me he wouldn't cum." Vampire said shaking his hed. "U wanna cum with me? 2 the concert?" **_Of course she does. _

**Then….. he showed me his flying car. I gasped. It was a black car. He said his dogfather Serious Blak **_Siriusly? _**had given it 2 him. The license plate on the front sed MCR666 on it. The one on da back said 'ENOBY' on it. **_Oh, how terribly sweet of him. _

…**.I gasped. **_Again with the gasping. _

**We flew to the concert hall. MCR were there, playing. **_We knew this. _

**Vampire and I began 2 make out, moshing to the muzik. **_Slut._** I gapsed, looking at da band.**

**I almost had an orgasim. Gerard was so fucking hot! **

**He begin 2 sing 'Helena' and his sexah beautiful voice began 2 fill the hall. ….And And den, I heard some crrying. I turned and saw Draco, cryin in a corner. **_Dracy! What are you doing crying again!_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: fuk u ok! u fokng suk. itz nut ma fult if itz speld rong ok koz dat bich ravern cuz it fok u prepz!1 woopz soz raven fangz 4 da help. btw transilvana rox hrad!1 I even gut 2 go 2 da kasel wer drkola was flimed! <strong>_I had to read that like three times and I still got a headache. _

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

**Later we all went in the skull. Draco was crying in da common room. **

**"Draco are u okay?" I asked in a gothic voice. **_It tears me up whenever Draco cries in the Half-Blood Prince. _

**"No I'm not u fuking bitch!" he shouted angrily. **_YES! DRACO! STRIKE BACK!_

**He stated to run out of the place in a suicidal way. **_Bahhahahahahaha, suicidal running! Was he carrying scissors?_

**I stated to cry cuz I was afraid he would commit suicide. **_…_

**"Its ok Enoby." said Vampire comfortly. "Ill make him feel better." **_By screwing him senseless in the lavatory. No. Ew. My mind rejected that immediately. _

**"U mean you'll go fuck him wont you!" **_EXACTLY WHAT HE MEANT!_** I shouted angrily. Then I ran 2 get Draco. Vampire came too. **_At least Harry doesn't have AIDS. _

**"Draco please come!" **_Oh, yes… please, Draco._** he began to cry. Tears of blood came down his pail face **_Bucket face xD_**. **

**I wuz so turned on cuz I love sensitive bi guyz. (if ur a homophone den fuk of! **_Homophone, a letter or diphthong that has the same sound as one or more other letters or diphthongs. I chose this definition because it had diphthong in it._**) And then… we herd sum footsteps! Vampire got out his blak invincibility coke. **_Invincibility coke. Now. I could drink that. (I laughed so hard when I read this that my god brother looked at me like I was completely insane. Then he asked me what I was reading, and he said he didn't get it. He isn't supposed to. I don't get it either. That's why it's so funny.)_

**We both gut under it. We saw the janitor Mr. Norris (**_Filch is now Chuck Norris, everybody. Watch him roundhouse kick this goffik bich_**) there, shouting angrily with a flashlight in his hand. **

**"WHOSE THERE!" he shouted angrily. We saw Filth come. **

**He went unda da invisibility cloke and started to meow loudly. **

**"IS ANY1 THERE!" yelled Mr. Norris. **

**"No fuck u you preppy little poser sun of a fukcing bich!" Vampire said under his breast **_Breast xD_** in a disgusted way.**

**"EXCUS ME! EXCUS ME WHO SED DAT!" yelled Mr. Norris. **

**Den he heard Filch meow. "Filth is der any1 unda da cloak!" he asked. Filth nodded. And then….Vampir frenched me! He did it jus as….. Mr. Norris was taking of da cloak!1 **_Wait… the cat…? The cat talked? Or Filch… or is Filch the cat now… Brain hurts. _

**"WHAT DA-" he yelled but it was 2 late cuz now we were ruining away frum him. . And den we saw Draco crying n bustin in2 tearz and slitting his rists outside of da school. **_Slitting his wrists because of YOU!_

**"Draco!" I cried. "R u okay?" **_You know, if I saw someone slitting their wrists, I would not ask them if they were okay. I would ask them what the hell they were going to accomplish killing their selves and throw that razor as far as I could. _

**"I guess though." Draco weeped. **

**We went back to our coffins frenching each other. **_You were kissing in two different coffins?_

**Draco and I decided to watch Lake Placid **_That reminds me of something perverted._** (c isnt da deprezzin) on the gothic red bed together. As I wuz about 2 put in the video, my eyes rolled up and suddenly I had a vision of something that was happening now. There was a knok on the door and Fug and da Mystery of Magic walked into the school! **_Dun dun dunnnn plot twist._


	12. Chapters 22 to 31

**AN: stfu! prepz stup flaming ok if u dnot lik it fuk of. I no itz mr. noris itz raven's folt ok!11 u suk!1 no jus kidding raven u fokieng rok prepz suk!1 XXXXXXXXXXX**

**All day everyone talked about the Misery of Magic. **_The poor Ministry is being shredded apart with the rest of them._

**Well anyway, I woke up the next day. I was in my coffin so I opened the door. I was wearing blak lacey leather pajamas. Then I gasped. **_Oh my!_

**Standing in front of me where…. B;loody Mary, Vampire, Diabolo, Draco, Dracula and Willow! **

**I opened my crimson eyes. **_You just now open your eyes? _

**Willow was wearing a tight black leather top with pictures of bloody roses all over it. Under that she wart a black poofy skirt wit lace on it and black gothic boots that was attached to the top. Vampire was wearing a baggy Simple Plan t-shirt and baggy black pants and Vans. **

**Draco was wearing a black MCR t-shirt and blak jeans and a leather jacket. He looked just likee Gerard Way, and almost as fucking sexy. **_Tom Felton is so much more than Gerard Way. The fact you compared him to Gerard infuriates the very core of my fan girl self._

**Vampire looked like Joel Madden. **

**B'loody Mary was wearing a tight black poofy gothic dress that she had ripped so it showed of all her clearage with a white apron that said 'bich' **_That sounds terrible._** and other swear words and MCR lyrics on it kind of like one dress I had seen Amy Lee wear once. **

**Darkness (who is Jenny **_Poor innocent little Ginny Weasely._**) was there too. She was weaving a ripped gothic black dress with ripped stuff all over it and a lace-up top thing and black pointy boots. **

**So were Crab and Goyle. **_Crabbe and Goyle were wearing ripped gothic dresses with ripped stuff all over it? Haha, that's amusing. Where's that camera?_

**It turns out that Darkness, Diabolo, Crab and Goyle's dad was a vampire **_So… now they're related?_**. He committed suicide by slitting his wrists with a razor. He had raped them and stuff before too **_Oh, I bet he won the Father of the Year award _**. They all got so depressed that they became goffik and converted to Stanism. **_Stan-ism. The South Park fandom created for Stan!_

**"OMFG" I yielded as I jumped up. "Why the fuck are u all here?" **

**"Enoby something is really fucked up." Draco said. **_This story? I agree, Draco. _

**"OK but I need to put my fucking clothes on first." I shouted angrily.**

**"It's all right. We have to go now and you look kawaii anyway. Your so fucking beautiful." Draco said in a sexy voice. **_His voice will always remain sexy. All British accents are meant to be sexual. _

**"Oh all right." I said smiling. "But you have to tell me why your being all erective." **_He's horny! _

**"I will I will." he said. **_By fucking you!_

**So I just put on some black eyeliner, black lipstick and red eyeshadow and white foundation. Then I came. **_You didn't put on clothes? Oh… great, Hogwarts the School of Wtichcraft and Nudity._

**We all went outside the Great Hal and looked in from a widow. A fucking prep called Britney **_Spears_** from Griffindoor was standing next to us. She was wearing a pink mini and a Hilary Duff t-shirt so we put up our middle fingers at her. **

**Inside the Great Hall we could see Dumbledork. Cornelia Fudged was there shouting at Dumbledore. Doris Rumbridge was there too. **_Haha. _

**"THIS CANNOT BE!" she shouted angrily. "THE SCHOOL MUST BE CLOSED!" **_At least she is in character. _

**"THE BARK LORD IS PLANNING TO KILL THE STUDENTS! yelled Cornelia Fudge.**

**"YOU ARE NOT FIT TO BE THE PRINCIPAL ANY LONGER!" yelled Rumbridge. **

**"YOU ARE TOO OLD AND YOUR ALZHEIMERS IS DANGEROUS! YOU MUST RETRY OR VOLDEMORT WILL KILL YOUR STUDENTS!" **_Yes, you must retry being principal, or face consequences. _

**"Very well." Dumbledore said angrily. "Butt **_tehe_** we cannot do this. We can't close the school. There is only one person who is capable of killing Voldemort and she is in the school. And her name is…..Enony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way. **_…Merlin's Beard. Dumbledore, maybe it is time to retire. _

**Draco, Crab, Goyle, Darkness, Willow, Vampire and B'loody Mary looked at each other…I gasped. **

**AN: dhut da fok up biches! ur jus jelos koz I gut 10000 **_flames_** reviowz!1 fangz 2 raven 4 da help n telin me bout da boox gurlu rok letz go shopin 2getha! **_Lemme guess, at Hot Topic where Tom Riddle will give you free clothes?_

**The door opened and Proffesor Rumbridge and Cornelia Fudge stomped out angrily. Then Dumbledum **_Dumbledum :D_** and Rumbridge sawed us. **_Ouch. _

**"MR. WAY WHAT THE BEEP ARE YOU DOING!" **_What the beep?_** Rumbridge shouted angril y. Dumbledore blared at her. **_Lol, he blared at her. _

**"Oops she made a mistake!" he corrupted her. "She means hi everybody cum in!" **_Yes. That's exactly what Umbridge meant. _

**Well we all came in angrily. So did all the other students. **

**I sat between Darkness and Draco and opposite B'loody Mary. Crab and Goyle started 2 make some morbid jokes. **_How come Crabbe and Goyle don't have goffik nicknames?_** They both looked exactly like Ville Vollo. **

**I eight some Count Chocula and drank som blood from a cup. **_Once more, I will never eat that cereal without thinking about this… _

**Then I herd someone shooting angrily. **_You can hear anger in a shoot?_** I looked behind me it was…Vampire! He and Draco were shooting at eachother.. **_Oh no. I hope Draco wins. (no offense to Harry fans )_

**"Vampire, Draco WTF?" I asked. **_"WE ARE SHOOTING EACH OTHER YOU PREP!"_

**"You fucking bustard!" yelled Draco at Vampire. "I want to shit next to her!1" **_Draco, that is rather unattractive. _

**"No I do!" shouted. **_Harry, same goes for you. _

**"No she doesn't fucking like u, you son of a bitch!" yelled Draco. **_She likes to fuck both of YOU though. _

**"No fuck you motherfucker she laves me not you!" shouted Vampire. **

**And then… he jumped on Draco! (no not in dat way u perv **_I didn't think anything of that sort until you mentioned it._**) They started to fight and beat up each other. **

**Dumbldore yelled at them but they didn't stop. All of a sudden… a terrible man with red eyes and no nose flew in on his broomstick. **_Can't you just say Voldemort flew in?_

**He had no nose **_you just… neverminf_** and was wearing a gray robe. **_wow, a colour change_

**All the glass in the window he flew thru fell apart. Britney **_Spears_** that fucking prep started to cry. **_Where did she come into the picture… oh, yeah A WHILE AGO!_

**Vampire and Draco stopped fighting….I shopped eating…. Everyone gasped. Da room fell silent….Volzemort! **_Hello Dark Lord. For once, it is nice to see you._

**"Eboby…..Ebony…." Darth Valer **_This is not Star Wars!_** sed evilly in his raspy voice. "Thou havfe failed ur mission. Now I shall kill thou and I shall kill Vampire as well. If thou does not kill him before then I shall kill Draco too!" **_You already planned on doing that in the first place. _

**"Plz don't make me kill him plz!" I begged.**

**"No!" he laughed crudely. "Kill him, or I shall kill him anyway!" **_Exactly._** . **

**Then he flew away cackling.**

**I bust into tears. Draco and Vampire came to contort **_(to make her unrecognizable?)_** me. Suddenly my eyes rolled up so they looked all cool and gothic. **

**I had a vision were I saw some lighting flash and then Voldremot coming to kill Draco while Draco slit his wrists in a depressed way. **_Well, he was only trying to save Draco the trouble, I guess. _

**"No!" I screamed sexily **_Yes, sexily. She just said sexily guys._**. Suddenly I locked up and stopped having the vision. **

**"Ebony Ebony aure you alright?" asked Draco in a worried voice. **

**"Yeah yeah." I said sadly as I got up. **

**"Everyfing's all right Enoby." said Vampire all sensetive.**

**"No its not!" I shouted angrily. Tearz of blood went down my face. "OMFG what if I'm getting possessed like in Da Ring 2!" **_She was more attractive than you. _

**"Its ok gurl." said B'loody Mary. "Maybe u should ask Proffesor Sinister about what the visions mean though." **_Is Sinistra the Divination Professor? *looks it up* NO! SHE IS THE ASTRONOMY TEACHER! (according to my Potter's World App.)_

**"Ok bich." I said sadly and den we went. **

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><p><strong>AN: prepz stup flaming da story ur jus jelous so fuk u ok go 2 hel!11raven fagz 4 di help! <strong>

**Well we had Deviation **_Deviation. I might like that class. _**next so I got to ask Proffessor Trevolry **_Trelawny, you have the same fate as ever other character in this story_** about the visions. **

**"Konnichiwa everybody come in." said Proffesor Sinister **_So… Sinistra decided to Transfigure into Trelawny and then back to… nevermind_** in Japanese. **

**She smelled at me with her gothic black lipstick. She's da coolest fucking teacher ever. **

**She had long dead black hair with blood red tips and red eyes. hr mom woz a vampire **_You knew her mom?_**. She's also haf Japanese so she speaks it and n b'loody mry get along grate) **

**She's really young for a teacher. **_You told me her hair was dead._** 2day she was wearinga black leather top with red laceand a long goffik black ripped dress. **_I'm sure the teachers have to abide by their own dress code._

**We went inside the black classroom with pastors of Emily the Strong **_You must mean Emily Rose. She needed a pastor too.(ahahaha, geddit? *is gonna use this story as an inside joke for the rest of her life*)_**. I raced my hand. I was wearing some black naie Polish with red pentagrams on it. **_We needed to know that, why?_

**"What is it Ebony?" she asked. "Hey I love ur nail polish where'd u get it, Hot Topik?" **_Nail polish doesn't come out like that on your nails… idiot. _

**"Yeah." I answered. **

**All the preps who didn't know what HT was gave me weird looks. **

**I gave them the middle finger. "Well I have to talk to you about some fings. When do you want to due it?" **

**"Ho about now?" she asked. **

**OK." I said.**

**"OK class fucking dismissed every1." **_That's such a polite way to send off your students._** Proffesor Trevolry **_Sinistra! Stop transfiguring._** said and she let every1 go. **

**"Except for you Britney **_Spears_**." she pointed at Britney and sum other preps. "Please do exorcize (geddit **_No. Shut up._**) 1 on page 3."**

**"OK I'm having lotz of visions." I said in a worried voice. I'm so worried is Draco gong 2 die. **

**Well she gave me a black cryptal **_(cryptal- code breaking)_** ball to lock in. I looked at it. **

**"What do you c?" she asked. **

**"I said I see a black gothic skull and a pentagram." **_Doesn't surprise us._

**Suddenly there was a knock at the door. I looked at it. **

**It was Draco. He was looking really sexy wearinga black leather facet **_Facet is not clothing._**, a black gothic Linkin Park t-shirtand blak Congress shoes. **_Bahaha, Congress shoes? Is he part of the Senate now?_

**"Okay you can go now, see ya cunt." **_She just called you a cunt, slut._** said Proffesor. **

**"Bye bitch." I said waving. **_Teachers now have no respect for their pupils. _

**I went to Draco and Vampire was sitting next to him. We both followed Draco together and I was so exhibited. **_And our first exhibit: the Most Goffik Retard Chick ever, Tara Gillespie!_

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><p><strong>AN: stop flaming ok if u dnot den il tel Justin2 bet u up!1111 <strong>_Justin? You mean the unfortunate soul you said was the luv of ur life in the first AN of this shithole? Poor boy._** n il tel al da nredz 2 put vrtuz in ur computer!11111111111 **_Oooooh, nerd viruses. Like the nerds are going to touch you with a ten foot pole._** FUK UU!1 raven fangz for de help!1 **

**I was so excited. I fellowed Draco wandering if we where going 2 do it again. **_You know, around Draco, there is bound to be thoughts of sex… but I'm sure even HE needs a break every once in a while. Don't use him up too much!_

**We went outside and then we went into Draco's black car. **_And fucked each others brains out. You AID infested whore. _

**"Ebony what the fuck did Profesor Trevolry say." whispered Draco potting his gothic whit hand with bvlak nail polish on mine. **_Oh…kay?_

**"She said she would tell me what the visions meant torromow." I grumbled in a sexy voice. **

**He took out a heroin cabaret and spiked it, and gave it to me to spork. **_Where are your parents, Draco!_

**He started to fly the car into a tree. **_Well, driving under the influence is kind of the trigger to reckless driving_** We went to the top of it. Draco put on some MCR.**

**"And all the things that you never ever told me And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me." sang Gerard's sexy voice. **

**We started tiling of each other's cloves **_…cloves._** fevently. He took of my blak thong and my black leather bar. **_You wear a bar?_** I took of his black boxers. Then… … … … … … … … …he put his trobbing you-know-what in my tool sexily. **_I told you to just say the words! _

**"OMFG Draco Draco!" I screamed having an orgism. **_See, the sex still only lasts two seconds. Draco, find someone worth the sweat and effort. _

**We stated frenching passively. Suddenly… … … … I fell asleep. I started having a it a black guy **_(that's racist!)_** was shooting two goffik men with long black hair. **

**"No! Please don't fucking kill us!1" they pleaded but he just kept shooting them. He ran away in a red car. **_I run away in my car too. The police told me I was going over the speed limit, but I put my middle finger up at them. (ha, another lame joke on my part.)_

**"No! Oh my fucking god!11" I shouted in a scared voice. **

**"Ebony what's wrong?" Draco asked me as I woke up opening my icy blue eyes. **

**I started to cry and tears of blood went down my face. I told Draco to call did it with his blak Likin Park the worst thing was who the ppl who were shot in the dream where… … … … … … … … …Lucian and Serious!111 **_Ah, there is your father, Draco. _

**AN: PREPZ STUP FLAMING SDA STRY OK!1 if u dnot lik da story den go fok urself u fokeng prep! U SUK!111 oh y and I wuznt beng rasist ok!11 **_Yes, yes you were, ok?_

**A few mutates later Vampire came 2 da tree. He was wearing a blak leather jackson, black leather pants and a Good Chralotte t-shirt. **_Black, black, a speck of red, more black. _

**"Hi Vampire." I said flirtily as I started to sob **_You flirt and cry about it?_**. **

**Draco hugged me sexily **_Oh baby._** (tryont to comfrot me. I started to cry tears of blood and then told them what happened.**

**"Oh fuck it!" Vampire shouted angrily. **

**He4 started to cry sadly. "What fucking dick did that!" **_The same dick covered in Chlamydia._

**"I don't know." I said. "Now come on we have 2 tell Dumbledor." **

**We ran out of the tree and in2 da castle. Dumblydor was sitting in his office.**

**"Sire are dads have been shot!" Draco said while we wipped sum tears from his white face. "Enoby had a vision in a dreem." **

**Dubleodre started to cockle. **_(cockle- shellfish with a heart-shaped shell.)_**. "Hahahaha! And How due u aspect me to know Ebony's not divisional?" **_I don't aspect you to understand what you just said, Dumblydore. _

**I glared at Dumbledore. **

**"Look motherfucker." he said angrily as Dumbeldore gasped (c is da toot of crakter **_Sure?_**). **

**"U know very well that I'm not decisional **_I thought you… bah!_**. Now get some fucking ppl out there to look for Series and Lucian- pornto!" **_Porn. Porn Toe. Hahahah…ha._

**"Okay." he said in a intimated voice. "Were are they?" **

**I fought about it. Then all of a sudden….. "Longdon. **_Longdon? Where is that?_**" I said. **

**I told him which street. **

**He went and called some people and did some stuff. **_How brilliant. _

**After a few mistunes he came back and said people were going out looking for them. **

**After a while someone called him again. **

**He said that they had been found. **

**Draco, Vampire and I all left to our rooms together. I went with Draco to wait in the nurses office while Vampire went to slit his wrists in his room. **

**We looked at each other's gothic, derperessed eyes. Then, we kissed. Suddenly Serious and Lucian came in on stretchers….and Proffesor Sinister was behind them!1 **_Sinistra was tired of all these imposters roaming around Hogwarts._

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><p><strong>Chapter 27. vampirz wil never hurt u <strong>_Then why do they drink blood and kill mercilessly? Or, in Twilight's case… why the FUCK do they sparkle?_

**AN: u no wut!111 I dnot giv a fok wut u prepz fink abot me!1111 so stup flaming da foking story bichez!1111 fangz 2 raven 4 ur luv n sport n help i luv u gurl soz i kodnt update lol I wuz rly deprezzd n I silt muh rists I had 2 go 2 da hospital rraven u rok gurl!11111111111111111111 **_Why does raven put up with her?_

**Every1 in the room stated to cry happly- I had saved them. **

**Drako, Lucian, Serious bond Vampire all came to hug me. **

**The nurse started to give them medicine. **

**"Cum on Enoby." said Proffesor Sinatra. **_OH FRANKIE!_** She was wearing a gothic blak leader dress with a corset top and real vampir blood on it and fuking black platinum boots. **_Oxymoron?_**" I have to tell you the fucking perdition." **_Aka you're future in hell. _

**I locked at Lucian, Serifs,Drake and Vampire. They nodded. **

**I smelled happily and went into a dark room. **

**I had changed **

**Profesor Sinister took out some black cards. She started to look into a black crucible ball. She said… "Tara, I see drak times are near." **_Aha, she admits once more that she is the main character. Tsk tsk, what will Justin think?_** She said badly. **

**She peered into da balls. **_Did Draco and Vampire take off their pants?_** "You see, you must go back in time." She took out a Time-Toner like B'loody Mary had. **

**"When Voldemint **_Wrigley's Gum Presents: The newest flavour- VOLDEMINT! Now longer lasting, with the taste of betrayal, death and… SPEARMINT! Take that, Stride Gum._** was in Hogwarts before he became powerful he gut his hearth borken. **

"**Now do you fink he would still become Volxemort if he was in love?" I shook my head. "U must go back in time and sedouce him. **_Poor Tom Riddle._** It is the only way. If he is still evil then you must kill him. You can come to my room tomorrow and you can do it." **_Don't say "come to my room" and "you can do it" in the same sentence. She might think something else. _

**"Okay." I said sadly. **

**We did dethz tuch sin. I went outside again sadly. **

**"What fucking happened?" asked Draco and Vampire. **_They're so FUCKING demanding._

**"Yeah what happened?" asked Darkness, Willow and Boldy Mary? **

**I was about to tell them butt every1 was there. They were celebrating Lucian and Sirius being fond. Everyone was proud of me butt I jut wonted 2 talk 2 Draco. T**

**hey were cheesing my name and some reporters were there, trying to interview Dumblydore. A banner was put up. **

**Lotz of fucking prepz were there oviously tring 2 be b goffik wering the HIM sign on their handz- depite them not having akshelly heard of him. **_Then why would they be wearing it?_

**Even Mr. Noris looked happy. A blak and red cake had been brought out. Crabbe and Goyke set up some fireworx in the shape of skulls from Wesley's Whizard Wises. **

**I put on my Invisibility coke with Vampire and Draco and we sneaked outside 2gether. **

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 28<strong>

**AN: I sed stop gflmaing da story it wuz a miskat wen profsor relory sed dat ok!11111111 GO 2 FOKENG HELL!1111 U SUK! fangz 2 fily 4 da help!1! raven hav fun wif kiwi!1111111 **

**We went in2 a blak room. The wallz were blak with portraits of gothic bands lik MCR, GC and Marlin Mason all over them. **_Black Room usually means it's going to be black. Duh._

**A big black coffin was in the middle. Red vevlet lined da blak box. There were three chairs made of bones with real skullz in dem. **

**I wuz wearing a blak corset bar wif purple stuff on it, fishnet suckings and a blak leather thong underneath. **_We really needed to know what you were wearing underneath your clothes._

**I sat down one of da chairs dispersedly. So did Drako and Vampire. **_They scattered in their chairs. That sounds dreadfully wrong._

**"Are you okay?" Vampir asked potting his albastard hand on mine. He was wearing black nail polish. I was wearing blak nail polish with red crosses on it. **_That's… again… whatever._

**"Yah I guess." I said sadly. **

**Drako also pot his hand on mine sexily. **_I picture him with his hand on my… I mean someone else's thigh sexily… yes. I am a pervert. Why do you think this commentary is rated M?_

**I smiled sadly with my blak lipstick. "The problem is….I have to seduce Volxemort. Ill have 2 go bak in time" **

**Draco started to cry sadly. Vampire hugged him. **_Why cry guys? You'll be rid of her for a little while! _

**"Itz okay Eboby." he said finally. "But what about me? Ur not gonna brake up or anyfing, are you?" **

**"Of coarse not!" I gasped. **

**"Really?" he asked. **_Translation: Fuck… _

**"Sure." I said. **_How very reassuring. _

**We frenched sexily. Vampire looked at us longingly. **_He wants a threesome. I just want you to fall out of a window. _

**Then… I took off Draco's MCR shrift and seductvely took of his pants. **_In the middle of the black room?_** He was hung lik a stallone. **_Must be better than being hung like a field mouse. _

**He had replaced the Vampire tattoo that said Enoby on it. **_You can't replace a tattoo… _**Black roses were around it. I gasped. He lookd exactly lik Gerard Way. **_Tom Felton is not anything like Gerard Way. Do I NEED to keep saying that? _

**Vampire took a vido camera. (I had sed it wuz ok b4).**

**I took of my clothes den we were in 4 da rid of r lif. **

**We started freching as we climbed into the cofin. He put his spock **_Poor Spock!_** in my you-know-what and passively we did it. **_I've also stated that sex with Draco would not be passive. _

**"I love you Eboby. Oh let me feel u I need 2 feel u." he screamed as we got an orgasm. We watched Vampire filmed everything perfectly. Suddenly…. **

**"WHAT THE FUCK R U DOING!"**

**It was….Snope and Profesor McGoggle!111 **

* * *

><p><strong>AN: sot das fok up!11 ur jus jelouz koz ur prepz so fok u!1111 raven u rok gurl fangz 4 da help MCR ROX 666!111111111111 <strong>

**"Oh my satan!1" we screamed as we jamped out of da coffin. **

**Snap**_ple_** and Professor McGoonagle started to shoot at us angrily. **_Shooting angrily! So much fun!_

**"CUM NOW!1!" Preacher McGongel yielded. **

**We did guiltily. **_Ew. _

**We left the room putting on our clothes. Snoop garbed the caramel and put it in his pocket. **_He says "My caramel, bitch!"_

**"Hey what the fuck!111" Vampire shooted angrily. **

**"Yeah buster what the fuck are u going to do with the fucking camera?" Draco demonded all protective, looking at me Longley with his gothic red eyes. **

**"Look, Dumblehor **_DUMBLEWHORE! Haha, I laughed so hard just now that I woke up my Chihuahua._** noes your little secret and if u do dis again, then u will go to St Mango's. So give back da camera!1111" **

"**Hahahaha the Mystery of Mogic thinks he is crazy there is no way dey wil believe him." Snoop laughed meanly. **

**"Yes so shut your mputh you inlosent fools!" yelled Proffesor McGoggle. **

**She made us cum into a weird room with white stones all around it. **

**There were all these werid tools in it. Draco started to cry all sexy and sexitive (geddit koz hes a sexbom lol but nut as muxh as gerard ur sex on legz I luv u u fokeng rok mary me!111 **_Even he has to have more sense than that. Although, you might actually be perfectly slutty enough for him._**). **

**I started to cry tearz of blood (it hapnz in vrampir kroniklz raven sed so ok so fok u!1). Vampire took out a black honkerchief and started to wipe my red eyes. **

**And then….. he and Snoop both took out guns using magic. They started to shoot each other angrily. Non of the ballots gut on eachodder yet. I took out my wand. **

**"Crosio!" I shouted. Snap**_ple_** stated 2 scram he dropd da gun. **

**But it was too late. Both of them had run out of ballets **_Swan Lake? A Classic._**. I STOPPED DA CURSE. Profesor McGoogle did a spell so that we were all chained up **_I prefer Immobilus myself._**. **

**She took out a box of tools. **

**Den she said "OK Serverus I'm going 2 go now." She left. **

**Snap**_ple_** started to laugh evilly. Vampire started to cry. **

**"It's ok Enoby." said Draco. "Evergreen will be all right. Remember the cideo u took of Snake." **

**Snape laughed again **_She actually spelled Snape right this time_**. And then...he took out some whips!1!1111 **

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><p><strong>AN: stop flaming da story ok u dnot no wutz even gona happen ok!1111 so FUL U!111 if u flam u wil be a prep so al flamerz kan kiss muh ass!111 soz 4 soz 4 sayin alzhimers is dongerous but datz da mysteries opinin koz sosiety basically sux. fangz 2 raven u rok bich!111 <strong>_I am going to stop reading the Author Notes, and writing my own. _

_KagsChann's A/N: keep flaming her story, where ever it might be now, and yes, it is predictable what is going to happen. You guys are preps. But, it has to be better than being goffik. Alzheimer's is something she obviously needs, and maybe society does suck, but so does TARA! See, that was so much better, I think. Oh wait… I FINK. _

**"No!11" we screamed sadly. **

**Snap**_ple_** stated loafing meanly. **

**He took out a kamera anvilly. Then… he came tords Darko!1! He took sum stones out of his poket. He put da stones around Draco and nit a candle. **

**"What the fuck r u doing!" I shooted arngrily. **

**Snoop laughed meanly. He polled down his pants. **

**I gasped- there was a Dork Mark on his you-know-wut!11! **_On Draco, or Snape's? Either way… _

**He waved his wand and a nife came. **

**He gave da knife 2 me. **

**"U must stab Vrompire." he said to me. "If u don't then I'll rap Draco!1" **_Snape, Snape, Snape, raping little boys won't help you at all. _

**"No you fucking bastrad!1" I yielded. **

**But den Draco looked at me sadly with his evil goffik red eyes dat looked so depressant and sexy. **

**He lookd exactly like a pentragram (lol geddit koz im a Satanist **_No, I don't get how a person can look like a pentagram._**) between Kurt Cobain **_*reminds self to see what Kurt Cobain looks like*_** and Gerard. **

**But then I looked at Vampire and he looked so smexy too wif his goffik black hair. **

**I thought of da time when we screwed and the time**_s_** I did it with Draco and Dumblydore came and the tame where Draco almost commited suicide and Vampire wuz so sportive. **_Brilliant run-on. _

**Snipe laughed angrily. He started to prey to Volxemort. **

**He started to do an incapacitation dancing around the stokes whipping Draco and Vampire. **

**Suddenly an idea I had. I clozd my eyes and using my vampire powers I sent a telepathetic massage to Drako and Vampire so they would destruct Snape. **_You mean you didn't use your telekinesis this time? _

**"Dumbeldork will get u!" Draco shooted. **

**"Yah just wait ubtil da Mystery find out!11" Vampire yelled. **

**Meanwhile I took out my wand. **

**"You ridiculus dondderhed!111" **_Out of all the misspelled words, dondderhed was not one of them? Wow, Works Processor._** Snoop yielded. He took off all of Drico's clothes. Just as he was about to rape him…. **

**"Crosio!" I shited **_Hahaha!_** pointing my wound. **

**Snoop scremed and started running around da room screming. **

**Meanwhile I grabed my blak mobile and sent a txt 2 Serious. **_You know, Muggle toys are not allowed in Hogwarts. The high amounts of magic will make it go haywire._** I stopped doing crucio. **

**"You dunderhed!111 Im going to kill-" shooted Snape but suddenly Serverus came. **_Severus interrupted himself?_

**Snake put the whip behind his bak. "Oh hello Sev I wuz just teaching them sumthing." he lied. **_Oh wait… is she referring to Snaketail? Because, it would have been helpful if she'd just said Peter came too. _

**But suddenly Lusian and Profesor Trevolry came in2 da room and they and Serious unlocked the chains and put dem around Snap. **

**Then Profesor Trevolry said 'Come on Ebony let's go." **

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I sed shut da fok up u quiephs!111 stop kalin ebony a mary su ok u dnot even no wutz gong 2 happen ok so fuk u!1111 fangz 2 muh bff raven 4 di help!1111 <strong>

**"I always knew u were on Voldemort's side, you sun of a bitca (bufy rox!111 **_Buffy is not here right now. This is Harry Potter on crack._**)." Serious said 2 Snape. **

**"No I'm not I was teaching them somefing!1" Snap clamed. **

**"Oh fucking yeah?" I took some blak Volremortserum **_Voldemort serum? I don't know whether that sounds interesting, or gross._** out of my poket and gave it to Serverus. **

**He made Snap dirnk it. **_Severus Snape, you cloned yourself, didn't you?_** He did arngrily. **

**Then Luscious took out a tape recorder and started playing it while he did curses on Snap. Then Proffesor Sinister and Lucian made us get out wif them while Snape told his secretes. Lucian took Vampure and Draco to the nurse after thanking me a millon times. **

**Profesor Trevolry took me to a dark room. Now I wuz going to go back in time to sedouce Volxemort. Moving posters of MCR and Nrivana were all over. **

**Hermoine, Darkness and Willow came too. B'loody Mary **_Is it me, or is she making clones… Hermione was supposed to be B'loody Mary, right? Did I miss something?_** gave me a blak bag from Tom Rid's store. **

**"Whatz in da bag?" I asked Profesor Trevolry. **

**"U will c." she said. **

**I opened thee bag. In it was a sexy tite low-smut **_Low smut- not enough sex, but still too much for her. _**black leather gothic dress. **

**It had red korset stuff and there was a silt up da leg. I put it on. **

**My frendz helped me put on blak fishnetz and blak pointy boots Willow had chosen. **

**Willow and Darkness helped me put on black eyeliner and blod-red lipshtick. **

**"You look fucking kawaii, bitch." B'loody Mary said. **_"You look trashy, you piece of shit."_

**"Fangs." I said. **

**"Ok now you're going to go back in tim." said Proffesor Sinister. "U will have to do it in a few sessionz." She gave me a blak gun. **

**I put it in a strap on my fishnetz like in Redisnet Evill. **

**Then she gave me a black time-tuner. "After an hour use da time torner to go back here." Proffesor Trevolry said. **

**Then she and B'loody Mary put a Pensive in front of me. Every1 went in front of it. **

**"Good luk!1" Everryone shooted. **

**Darkess and Willow gave me deth's touch sin. Then….. I jumped sexily in2 da Pensive. **

**Suddenly I was in fornt of teh School. In front of me wuz one of da sexiest goth guyz I had ever seen. He was wering long blak hair, kinda like Mikey Way **_Gerard's brother, I presume._** only black. He had gren eyes like Billie Joe Amstrung and pale whit skin. He wuz wearing a blak ripped up suit wif Vans. It was….Tom Bombodil!1111 **_Tom who now?_


	13. Chapters 32 to 38

_excuse me if I forget things that have happened in this story. I tend to do that while reading this. It's so random and stupid that my brain can't process it well… I don't really care though :D (Review and tell me what you think of my commentary if you like!)_

**000000**

**AN: I sed stup fflaming I no his nam iznt tom bodil dat wuz a mistak!1111 if u dnot lik de story den u kan go skrew urself!11111 U SUK!111111 **

**"Hi." I said flirtily. "Im Enoby Way da new student." I shok my pale handz wif their blak noil polish wif him. **

**"Da name's Tom." he said. "But u kan call me Satan. Datz ma middle nam" **_Tom Satan Riddle. _

**We shok hands. "Well come on we have 2 go upstairs." Satan said. **

**I followed him. "Hey Satan…..do u happen to be a fan of Gren Day?" (sinz mcr and evinezenz dont exist yet den **_Green Day wasn't even thought of back then._**) I asked. **

**"Oh my fuking god, how did u know?" Satan gasped. "actually I like gc a lot too."(geddit coz gc did that song I just wanna live that's ounded really 80s **_That doesn't mean they existed back then either…_**) **

**"omg me too!" I replied happily. **

**"guess what they have a concert in hogsment." satan whispered. **

**"hogsment?" I asked. **

**"yeah that's what they used to call it in these time before it became Hogsmeade in 2000. **_Because he totally knows that._**" he told me all sekrtivly. "and theres a really cool shop called Hot-" **

**'topic!" I finshed, happy again. **_LIKE OH MAH GOD DUDE, NO WAY!_

**He froned confusedly. "noo its called Hot Ishoo." He smiled skrtvli again. "then in 1998 dey changd it to hot topic." he moaned. **_Once again. He shouldn't know that, nor should he care. _

**"ohh." now everything was making sense for me. **_Really? Then fill me in._** "so is dumblydor your princepill?" I shouted. **

**"uh-huh." he looked at his black nails. "im in slitherin'" **_As is everyone else. Unless you're a prep. Sorry._

**"OMfG SHME TOO!" I SHRIEDKED.**

**"u go to this skull?" (geddit cos im goffik) he asked. **

**"yah that's why im here im NEW." I SMELLED HAPPili. **

**Suddenly dumblydore flew in on his broomstuck and started shredding at us angrily. "NO TALKING IN THE HALLS!" he had short blonde hair and was wearing a polo shirt from Amrikan ogle outfters. "STUPID GOFFS!" **

**satan rolled his eyes. "his so mean to us goffs and punks just becose we're in slytherine and we're not preps." **

**I turned around angrily. "actually I fink mebe its becos ur da barke lord." **_The tree lord __J__ Voldy is a tree-hugger. _

**"wtf?" he asked angrily. **

**"oh nuffin." I said sweetly. **

**then suddenlyn…. the floor opened. "OMFG NO I SCEAMED AS I FEEL DOWN. everyone looked At ME weirdly." **

**"hey where r u goin?" satan asked as I fell. **

**I got out of the hole n it was bak in the pensive in professor trevolry's classroom. dumblydum wuz dere. **

**"dumblydore I think I just met u." I said.**

**"oh yeah I rememba that." dumblydor said, trying to be all goffik. **

**sinister came in. "hey dis is my classroom wait wtf enoby what da hell r u doing?" **

**:"um." I looked at her. **

**"oh yeaH I forgot bout that." **_What just happened?_

**"wth how?" I screamed forgetting she was a teacher for a second. but shes a goff so its ok. **

**professor sinster looked sad. "um I was drinking voldemortserum." she started to cry black tears of depression. dumblydum didn't know about them. **

**"hey r u crying tears of blood?" he asked curiously, tuching a tear. **

**"fuck off!" we both said and dumblydum took his hand away.**

**professor sinster started crying again in her chair, sobbing limpid tears. "omfg enoby…I think im addicted to Voldemortserum." **_I'm addicted tp Voldemint. We both have problems. _

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I sed shut up itz nut my folt ok if u don't lik da story den ur a prep so fuk u flamerz!1111 ps im nut updating ubtil u giv me fiv god reviewz nd diz tim I men it!111111 U SUK!1111 fangz raven 4 di help il promiz to help u wif ur story lolz1 <strong>

_KagsChann's A/N: It's totally Tara's fault that no one likes this story. This is exactly why we take it, comment on it, and show it off to the world. Poor raven must not have many friends because of her. _

**"Oh my fuking god!1" I shooted sadly. "Shud we get u 2 St Manga's, bitch?" **

**"Hel no!" she said. "Lizzen Egogy, I need ur help. Nex tim u go bak in tim, do u fink u kod ask Tom Andorson 4 sum help?" **_Now he's Tom Anderson. _

**"Sure' I said sadly. **

**I went outside the door. Draco was there!111 He wuz wearing a big blak GC tshit which wuz his panamas. **

**"Hey Sexxy." I said. **

**"How'd it go Enoby?" he asked in his voice was so sexy and low kinda like Gerard Way when hes talking. **

**"Fine." I reponded. We stared 2 go bak in2 da dorm. **

**"How far did u go wif Satan?" Drako asked jealously. **_She fucked him, even though that's a lie, you should believe it anyways, Draco. I know you can do much better. I prefer you stay with Astoria and leave this slut alone. (that's coming from someone who doesn't like Astoria Greengrass. I prefer the DraMione pairing better.)_

**"Not 2 far, lol." I borked. **

**"Will you hav to do it with him?" Draco asked angstily. **_If she didn't have to, I bet she'll do it anyways. _

**"I hop not 2 far!111" I shouted angrily. Den I felt bad 4 shooting at him. **

**I said sorry. We frenched. **

**"What happened 2 Snipe?" I growled. **

**"U will see." Draco giggled mistressly. **

**He opened a door…Snap nd Lumpkin werz there!11 Serious waz pokering dem by staging dem wif a blak nife. **

**"NOOOO PLZ!1111" Lumpkin bagged as Serious started 2 suk his blood. **_Padfoot! How dare you stab Moony like that!_

**I laffed statistically. **

**I tok some photons of him and Snap bing torqued. (ok I no dis iz men but fink abot it ppl dey r pedoz nd Snap trid 2 rap dem and neway sadiztz rok haz any1 seen shrak atak 3 lolz **_thanks for the info._**). **

**We took sum of Snipe's blod den Drako and I went bak 2 our roomz. **

**We sat on my goffik blak coffin. My cloves were kinda drity so I pot on a blak leather outfit fingie kinda like da 1 Suelene haz in Undreworld. (if u haven't herd of it den FUK U!111 **_I guess I'm a prep then._**) . I put on some blak platform high heelz. **

**Darko put on 'desolition liverz' by MCR. Den….we storted 2 take of eachotherz clozez. **_But you just… ohm… why do I even try to understand?_

**I tok of his shit nd he had a six-pak, lolz. We started 2 mak out lik in Da Grudge **_Oh god. I am terrified of that girl in the Grudge…_**. **

**He pot his wetnes in my u-know-what sexily. I gut an orgy. **_So other people joined you?_

**"Oh Draco!111111!1 Oh mi fuking gud Draco!1111" I screemed passively as he got an eructation.**

**"I luv u TaEbory." he whispred sexily and den we fel aspleep lol **

* * *

><p><strong>AN: SHOT DA FOK UP PREPZ!1111 hav u even red de story!11 u r proly al just prepz nd posrs so FUK U!111 fangz 2 raven 4 da help!1<strong>

_KagsChann A/N: I have read the story, unfortunately. Let's see what misery and slutty woe she has injected into THIS chapter. _

**I wook up in da coffin de next day. **

**Draco waz gone. I got up and put on a blak tight sexah drsss that was all ripped at da end. **

**There wuz red korset stuff going up da fornt and da bak and it came up 2 my knees. T**

**here wuz a slit in da dress lik in mr & mr simth. **

**I pot on ripped blak fishnets and blak stilton bo-ots. Suddenly…. Sorious cocked on da door. I hopened it.**

**"Hi Ibony." he said. "Gezz wut u have 2 cum 2 Profesor Sinistor's office." **

**"Ok." I said in a deprezzd voice. I had wanted to fuk Draco or maybe lessen to MCR or Evonezcence. I came anyway. **_She be a nympho, yo._

**"So what the fuck happened 2 Snipe and **_Froot_** Loopin?" I asked Sorious flirtily. **

**"I fucking tortured them." he answered in a statistic way. "They r in Abkhazian now, lol." **

**I laughed evilly. **

**"Where r Draco and Vampira?" I muttered. **

**"Dey are xcused form skool 2day." Sodomize **_BAHAHA_** moaned sexily. "Rite now they are watching Da Nigtmare b4 Xmas." **

**We went into da office. Proffesor Sinister was there. She was wearing a goffik blak dress that was all ripped all over it kinda lik da one Amy Lee wears in this pic **_I deleted the link, bitch, because no one cares._

**She wuz drinking some Volximortserum. **

**She took out da Pensiv and the time-torner.**

**"Enoby, you will have to do anozzer session now. Also I need u to get me da cure 4 being adikited." she said sadly. "Good luck. Fangz!" **

**And then….I jumped into the Prinsive again. Suddenly I looked around…I was in da Grate Hall eating Count Chorcula. It was mourning. I was sitting next to Satan. **

**On a table was a tall gottik man wif long blak hair, pail skin and blue eyes wering a suit and blak Cronvrese shoes. He looked just like Charlyn Manson. I noticed…he was drinking a portent. **

**"Whose he!11" I asked. **

**"Oh, datz Profesor Slutborn. **_Lol. Slutborn makes me giggle._**" Satan said. "He's da Portents teacher…..Ebony?"**

**"Yah?" I asked. **

**"Did u know dat Marylin Mason is playing in Hogsemade tonight? And they r showing The Exercise at da movies b4 dat." **

**"Yah?" **

**"Well…...want 2 go 2 da contort and da movie wif me?" **_Most certainly, only if you promise to sleep with her in the end. Geez. No wonder you're so evil, Tom. _

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 35. gost of u <strong>_Is such a terrible song._

**AN: fangz 2 suzi 4 da idea!1u rok! fuk of prepz!11111111 fangz 2 raven 4 di help u rok gurl!1 ps im gong 2 end da stroy rlly sun so FUK U!111 oh yah nd if u no eny gofik namz plz tel me koz I ned 1 4 serius!1 fangz. **

_KagsChann A/N: I'm sure you all know the story is ending soon. _

**I went in2 da Conmen Room finking of Satan. **

**Suddenly I gasped…..Draco wuz there!111 **

**I grasped. He locked as hut as eva werring blak ledder pants, a blak Lonken Prak t-shrit and blak eyeliner. **_I did happen to see a picture of Tom Felton with eyeliner, or something, on his face. It was for another movie… and I thought, so this is the culprit. Needless to say, Tom Felton is still forever gorgeous. _

**"Draco what da fuk r u dong!111111" I gosped. **

**"Huh?" he asked. Then I remembred. It wuzn't Draco. It was Lucan!1 He stil had two arms. **_LUCIUS MALFOY!_

**"Oh hi Lucian!1" I sed. "Im Ebony the new student lol we shook handz." **

**"Yah Satan told me abot you." Lusian said. **

**He pinted to a groop of sexxxy gottik guyz. They where siting in a corner kutting. **

**It wuz Serious, Vampire's dad **_James was there too?_** and…Snap**_ple_**! All of them were wearing blak eyeliner and blak Good Chralootte band shirts. **

**"Lizzen I'm in a goth band wif those guys." he said. "Were playing 2nite at da Marylin Mason show as back-up. **_Lucius, you are not to dilly dally in such activities. _

**"ORLY." I ESKED. **

**"Yeah." he said. "Were calld XBlakXTearX. I play teh gutter. Spartacus **_Who the hell is Spartacus?_** plays da drums" he said ponting to him. "Snap plays the boss. And Jamez plays the guitar to even fo we call him Samaro, after Samara in da ring." **_Surprisingly, Prongs doesn't have a goffik nickname either. _

**"Hey bastards." I told them they gave me Dethz tuch sin. **

**Suddenly I gasped again. **

**"But don't u have a lead singer!" I asked. Lucian looked dawn sadly. **

**"We uzd to but she did. She contempted suicide by silting her rists." **

**"Oh my fuking god!11 Datz so fuking sad!1" I gasped. **

**"Its okay but we need a new led snigger." Samaro said. **

**"Wel…..I said Im in a bnad myself." **_A shitty one. _

**"Rilly?" asked Snap. I cudnt belive it. He used 2 b goffik!111 **_Snivellus used to be a lot of things. _

**"Yeah were called Blody Gothik Rose 666. Do u wanna hr me sing?" **

"**Yeah" said everyone. **

**So the guys tok out der guitarz. They began to pay a song bi (geddit koz bi guyz r sooo sexah!11 **_You make so much out of so little_**) Gurn Day.**

**"I wok dis empt stret on da bolevrad of broken dremz." I sang sexily (I dnot own da lyrikz 2 dat song).. Every1 gasped. **

**"Enopby? Will u join da band? Plz!1" begged Lucian, Samoro, Serious and Snap. **_One line and she's in the band?_

**"Um….ok." I shrugged. "Are we gong to play tonight?" **

**"Yah." they said. **

**"Ok." I said but I new dat I had 2 get a new outfit. I walked outside wondering how I kud go forward in time. **

**Suddenly someone jumped in fornt of me. It wuz…..Morty Mcfli!1 He was wering a blak bnad tshrit and blak bagy jeans. **_Morty who?_

**"What da hell r u dong here!11" I asked. **

**"I wil help u go frowad in tim Enoby." he said siriusly Den….he took out a blak tim machine. I went in2 it and…..sudenly I wuz forward in tim!111 **

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I sed stop flaming ok!111111111 I bet u r al proly old srevinty yr oldz!111 ps PORTERSUZ UR A PREP!1 o ya nd fangz 2 raven 4 di help!111 hav fun in englond gurl!11111 <strong>

_Yes, because seventy-year-old women read stories like this._

**I loked around in a Suddenly I saw Profesor Sinister. B'lody Mary, Socrates and Draco, Vampire and Willow were their to. **

**"OMFG Sorius I saw u nd Samaro and Snip nd everyone!11111 I kant beleev Snap uzd 2 b goffik!111111" **

**"Yah I no." Serious said sadly.**

**"Oh hey there bitch." Profesor Trevolry said in an emo voice dirnking some Volxemortserom. **

"**Hi fuker." I said. "Lizzen, Satan asked me out to a gottik cornet and a movie so I need a sexah new outfit for da date. Also I'm playng in a gothic band so I need an ootfit for that too." **

**"Oh my satan!1" (geddit lolz koz shes gofik) gasped B'lody Mary. "Want 2 go to Hot Topik to shop 4 ur outfit?" **_if hot topic sold groceries, she would never have to go to another store ever again._

**"OMFS, letz have a groop kutting session!11" said Profesor Trevolry. **_YAY! That's what all the COOL kids are doing!_

**"I can't fucking wait 4 dat but we need 2 get sum stuff first." said Willow. **_I can't stand the wrist cutting thing. It's atrocious. _

**"Yah we need sum portions for Profesor Trevolry so she wont be adikted 2 Volxemortserum anymore nd also….sum luv potion 4 Enoby." Darko said resultantly. **

**"Well we have potions klass now." Willow said so let's go.**

**We went sexily to Potionz class. But Snap wasn't there. Instead there was…Cornelio Fuck!11111 **

**"Hey where the fuck is Dumblydore!111" Draco shouted angrily. **

**"STFU!1" shooted Cornelia Fuck. "He is in Azkhabian now wif Snip and Loopin he is old and week he has kancer. "Now do ur work!111" **

**My friendz and I talked arngrily. **

**"Can you BELEVE Snap used to be gottik!1" Vampire asked surprisedly. **

**"DATZ IT!11" CORNELIO FUK SHOOTED ARNGRILY. "IM GETTING PROFESOR BRIDGE!111" **

**He stomped out angrily. **

**Mi frendz and I began talking again. I began to drink some blod mixed wif beer. Suddenly I saw Hargrid in da cupboard. **_That has to be one BIG cupboard._

**"WTF is he doing?" I asked. Then I looked at Draco. He wuz wearing tonz of eyeliner nd he locked shexier den eva. (Suddenly… "HARGRIF WUT DA FOK R U DOING!11" he shooted. **

**I looked around….Hairgrid wuz putting sumfing in my glass of blod!11 Darko and Vampire started 2 beat him up sexily. **

**"God u r such a posr!1" I shooted at Hairgrid. Suddenly I looked ar what he was putting in da blood. It was…Amnesia Portion!111 **_Drink it anyways._

* * *

><p><strong>AN: OK EVRYBODY IM GONG ON VOCATION ON DA FRIST OF JULY SO IM EEDER GONNA END DA FIK OR UPDAT IT IN WEEX. fangz!1 oh yah nd prepz stop flaming sa story!11 raven fangz 4 da help c ya gurl afta vocation!11<strong>

**DARKO'S PONT OF VIEW LOL **

**Vampire and I chaind Hairgrid 2 da floor. **

**"Oh mi fucking satan!11" Enoby said. She wuz so hot. **_You are not Draco, you are not Draco._** "Maybe I cud uze Amnesia potion 2 make Satan foll in love wif me faster!1" **

**"But u r so sexy and wonderful aneway Tata," Vampire. "Why would u need it?" **_You are not Harry, you are not Harry. _

**"To make everyfing go faster lol." said Enoby. **

**"But you wont have to do it wif him or anyfing, will u?" I asked jelosly. **_Yes, Draco, she will. _

**"OMFG u guyz r so scary!11" said Britney **_Spears_**, a fucking prep. **

**"Shut the fuk up!1" said Willow. **

**"Ok well anyway lets go 2 Profesor Trevolry's room." **

**Draco, Ebory and I went **_You were there twice?_** to Profesor Siniater's room. But Profesor Sinister wasn't there. Instead Tom Rid was. **

**Oh hi fuckers he said. "Lizzen, I got u sum kewl new clovez." **

**I took out da cloves from da bag. It was a goffik blak leather miniskirt that said '666' on da bak, black stilton bootz, blood red fishnetz and a blak corset. **_Okay, I believe there was a POV change here. _

**"OMG fangz!" I said hugging him in a gothic way. I took da clothes in da bag.**

**"OK Profesor Sinister isnt hr what the fuk should we do?" asked Draco. Suddenly he loked at a sign on da blak wall. **_At least let us know when you change POV, geez. _

**"Oh my fuking satan!1" I screamed as I read it. **

**On it said Evry1 Profesor Sinister is away. She is too gottik she is in Azkhabian now. Classes shal be taught by Dubledork who is bak but he shall not be principal 4 now. Sincerely Profesor Rumbridge. **

**"OMFG!111" I shoted arngrily. "How could they do that!11" **

**Suddenly Dumblydore came. **

**"WHAT DA HELL R U DONG IN MY OFICE!1" he began to shoot angrily. **

**Sudwenly I saw Morty Mcfly's blak tim machine!111 I jumped seductivly in2 it leaving Draco and Vampire. **

**Sudenly I wuz back in tim!11 I looked around. It was…Profesor Slutborn's efface! I sneaked around. Suddenly I saw da Amnesia potion on his desk. It wuz blak wif blood-red pentagramz in it **_Of course it was._**. It was the shape of a cross. **_Shocking._** I put it in my poket. Suddenly da door opened it wuz…..Profesor Slutgorn!11 **

**OMG wut r u doing fuker" he shooted angrily **

"**I don't kno wut da fuk r u DOING" I SHOUTED ANGRILY. **

**"Oh sorry I wuz just looking around koz I thought it wuz class." you said finally hoping he couldn't c da potion in ur pocket. "Oh ok u can go now." said Profesor Slutborn. **

**You went to the conmen room after putting on my clothes. Silas, Samaro and Snap were there practicing Vampirez will Never Hurt U by MCR. **_What what what?_

**"Oh hi you guys." I said seductively. "Wheres Satan?" **

**"Oh he's cumming." said Serious. "BTW u can kall me Hades now." Suddenly Satan came. He was wearing a smexxy blak leather Jackson, blak congres shoes, a Slipnot t-shirt and a blak tie. **

**"Ok I will see you guyz at da concert." I said and then I went with Satan. **

* * *

><p><strong>AN: wut doez every1 fink if I end da strory and den I add sum more 2 it after vocation? oh yah asnd prepz stup flaming if u dnot lik dat story den take muh quiz ok den u wil c if ur gofik or not!1111111 <strong>

_Ending the Story means… HOORAY!_

**Satan and I walked 2 his car. **

**It wuz a blak car wif pentagrams all over it. On da license plate said 666 just lik Draco's car. **

**I went in it seduktivly. Stan started 2 drive it. **

**We talked about Satanism (lolz he wuz named after Satan), kuttting, musik and being goffik. **

**"Oh my satan, Gerard is so fuking hot!11" Volxemort **_you mean tom_** agreed as we smoked sum weed. (koz bi guyz r hot dey r so sensitive I luv dem lol goez fux a bi guy) **

**"Lol, I totally decided not 2 comit suicide when I herd Hilena." I said in a flirty voice. "….Hey Satan do u know da cure 4 when ppl r adikted 2 Volxemortseruem?" **

**"Well…" he thought. "I fink u have 2 drink Vampire blod." **_Vampire blood? Why didn't I think of that?_

**Suddenly Volxemort parked da car behind a blak movie theater. **

**Satan and I walked outside. We went in2 da movie tether were they were showing da Excercist. In it a boy and a gurl were doing it sudenly a cereal killer came lol. Satan and I laughed at da blood koz we're sadists. **

**While Satan was watching da movie, I had an idea. I took Satan's gothic blak Nightmare b4 Christmas cigar **_That is one weird cigar._** sexily from his poket and put sum Amnesia potion in it. **

**I put it bak in his blak Emile the Strange bag. Satan turned arund and started 2 smoke it. Blak cloudz wif red pentagramz ind em started 2 fly around everywhere. **

**"OMG!111" Satan said jumping up. I gasped koz I wuz afraid hed notizd. "Enoby gess what?" **

**I new that the amnesia had worked. **

**"Amnesia potion has not been invented yet so it will not work." He said. **_Okay, I give up._

**"2 badd coz I wanted 2 use sum on u." **

**"Kul." I raised my eye suggestingly. And den…. he tok of my cloves sexily I tok of his shit. He had six-pak justr lik Gerard Way!11 We frenched. **_I'm telling Draco, you whore. _

**"Xcuze me but u r going 2 have 2 leave!111" shooted da lady behind us she was a prep. **

**"Fuk u!11" I said. Suddenly…. I attaked her suking all her blood. **

**"Noooooo!11" she screamed. All the preps in da theater screamed but everyone else crapped koz Satan and I loked so cute 2gether. Satan and I started to walk outside. **

**"Zomg how did u do that?" Voldremort asked in a turned-on voice.**

**"I'm a vampire." I said as we went into the car. **_DUH-HUUUUH!_

**"Siriusly?" he gasped. **_Serious as Sirius Black!_

**"Yah siriusly." I said drinking sum beer. Satan started 2 drive da car. I smelled happily. **

**"Itz too bad we didn't get 2 c da rest of the movie, don't u fink?" **

**"Yah." I said as we kised passively. Satan parked in a blak driveway next 2 da place where Draco and I had watched GC for the frist time. We went inside where Marylin Mason wuz playing and started to mosh lol.**

**"Anti-ppl now uve gone 2 far Jeus Krist Superstar!1111" screamed Marlin on da stage. **

**We did the devil fingers. I started 2 dance really close to Satan. He was so shmexay!1 He looked at me all emo with his gothic red eyes and he looked exactly like Mikey Way. I almost got an orgaism!1 Suddenly Marylin Mason stopped singing. **_You had an orgasm just dancing with him? Yeah, Draco will not be happy. _

**"I wood like to peasant… ..XBlakXTearX!11" he said. I ran onstage**

**Lucian, Samaro, Snap and Hades were there. They started 2 play their instilments. **

**"Wel if u wonted honesty datz all u had 2 say!1111" I sang. (I dnot own da lyerix 2 dat song) My voice sounded lik a pentagram betwen Amy Lee and a gurl version of Gerard Woy **_Well, that sounds pleasant._**. **

**Everyone clappd. Satan got an eructation. **

**"I'M NUT OKAY!1" **_WE KNOW THAT!_** I sang finaly. Suddenly Lucian started playing da song wrong by mistak.**

**"OMFG!1" yielded James. "Wut the fuck?" **

**"Woops im sory!" said Lucian.**

**"You fuking ashhole!1" James shouted angrily. **

**"U guys are such prepz!11" Snap said. "Cum on it wuz a mistake!1"**

**"Yah itz not his fault!11" said Serious. **

**"No he ruined the fucking song!1" yelled Samaro. **

**"U guys stop!11" I shotoed angrily but it waz 2 late. They all began 2 fight. Sudenly Samaro took out hiz nife. **

**"OMFG no!11" shouted Lucan but it wuz 2 late James tried 2 shoot off his arm. **

**And den…I jumped secxily in front of da bullet!11 **

**"No!111" yielded everyone but it wuz 2 late suddenly everyfing went blak. **

_That is all I could find, or maybe this was the very end before it got deleted. I'm not sure, but I know one thing, I cannot take another ounce of this story! Commentary is finished! I do hope you guys enjoyed what I had to say. It was fun and all, but now… to the NORMAL stories_


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